# The Best Lines You've Heard from Car Salesman?



## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

As title on my mammoth hunt for my last car I heard some great lines from car salesman, what's the best you have heard?

I liked this one, I can't tell you the best price unless you give me your credit card details so I know you are serious about buying it:lol:


Disclaimer no salesman were hurt on my car hunt although I did feel like hurting some with the nonsense they said:lol:


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## andy665 (Nov 1, 2005)

This is a positive one that I heard yesterday - delivered to my good self

"Great, that's 10.30, the car will be ready, we'll go out and have some fun with it and let the car sell itself - I'm merely the passenger"


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

andy665 said:


> This is a positive one that I heard yesterday - delivered to my good self
> 
> "Great, that's 10.30, the car will be ready, we'll go out and have some fun with it and let the car sell itself - I'm merely the passenger"


God someone that understand how to sell car let it get them emotional about it well done mr salesman


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## leeandfay (May 2, 2017)

Because I have tattoos on my hands and neck and turned up to a Bmw dealership in filthy work clothes I was basically told how expensive the cars were. 

After a month I took both my new BMWs to the dealership and told him that was the 72 grand he could have had a piece of and never judge a book by its cover 

He no longer works there


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## Blackwatch (Jul 29, 2015)

Not so much as a customer but at the dealership I just left.

8:02AM ME : " Morning "

8:03AM Director : " Grunt "

8:03AM ME : " Ill just get the gates opened, get the valet bay sorted and make sure everything is ready for the day "

8:03AM Director " Grunt "

8:27AM ME " Right that's everything sorted and we are good to go. IS there anything needing doing today urgent as I have that Private MGF to crack on with as its having a ceramic coat and they want it back ASAP, so its going to keep me flat out. "
for at least 72 hours
8:28AM Director " Errr yes That BMW X5 is sold and the customer is coming for it at 10AM "

8:29AM ME " No worries, its fairly clean already, however I'll give it a quick wash etc so its ready "

8:30AM DIRECTOR " No it needs minting, It needs a full hoover inside all the plastics need dressing, the leather needs treating and conditioning. Then it needs a full machine polish and at a ceramic coat on "

8:31AM ME " MUHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAH "




Incidentally this is the day I quit the job


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

Had very similar AA

Arranged test drive arrived car not there was very casually dressed when I was a bit annoyed he said well was you going to buy it anyway with smirk.
Smirk soon swiped right off his face as one of my clients enters dealers and says have you got that new merc yet with the salesman standing there


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## GleemSpray (Jan 26, 2014)

Back in the 80's and along with my brother to support him in looking at a used Mini Metro:

*Salesman* "_Great car this and previously owned by a celebrity_"

*Us *"_Who was it ... ??_"

... and remember this was the 1980's .... 

*Salesman *"_a relative of Sid Lawrence, the big band leader !!!!_

*Us*: :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

Followed by :tumbleweed: :tumbleweed::tumbleweed:

*Salesman* "_ Oh ... _"


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

Very positive one very interested in Jag and we had been chatting about festival of speed, salesman said would you and your son like to be guests of JAg at FOS and drive the Jag up the hill
Ledgened free food and drink all wekend with a trip up the famous hill along with our tickets for the moving motor show on the Thursday was fantastic


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## chrisc (Jun 15, 2008)

Telling me how good the car was pulling a caravan being diesel.but its petrol


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

chrisc said:


> Telling me how good the car was pulling a caravan being diesel.but its petrol


Got one similar , called dealer looking for an M4 CP , salesman are you interested in an M3 me no , I say how many M3's do you have? Salesman 3 , me how many M4's you got , salesman none. Me there lies a problem:lol:


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## wayne451 (Aug 15, 2016)

Blackwatch said:


> Not so much as a customer but at the dealership I just left.
> 
> 8:02AM ME : " Morning "
> 
> ...


A 3 day detail on an MGF would set you back twice the cars value! :lol:


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## PugIain (Jun 28, 2006)

Buying a Peugeot 407 X-line.
Me "This should have a CD changer in the boot"
Salesman, "I don't know, you probably know more about it than me"

Way to know your trade son.

Sent from my VFD 710 using Tapatalk


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## Andyblue (Jun 20, 2017)

PugIain said:


> Buying a Peugeot 407 X-line.
> Me "This should have a CD changer in the boot"
> Salesman, "I don't know, you probably know more about it than me"
> 
> ...


Had this last week with father in law at a Peugeot dealer - I asked what the difference between the 2 cars was, same car just 1 was hatch, 1 estate, both at same price and same age.

"No difference at all" came back the reply, "it's just that is an estate"... well upon further insepction, the estate was basic model, steel wheels, smaller engine, non metallic paint, whereas the hatch was mid range - had alloys etc and metallic paint and less milage, needless to say, he bought the hatch and was very happy with the deal we got and the car he now has :thumb:


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## GleemSpray (Jan 26, 2014)




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## millns84 (Jul 5, 2009)

Don't think mine will compare to most on the thread, but here goes... 

I walk into a well known dealership around the time the new Panda was released, show interest and sit down to talk prices/monthly payments. I'm already aware of a deal Fiat have on their website and suggest monthly payments in line with that. The salesman entered negotiations £70 per month higher and the best he could do was £30 per month higher (bearing in mind its a cheap little car so that's a fair bit). 

Long story short, I mention the said deal and ask if they can match it. His response "well if they're selling them for that then go and get one from them"... and that was that. So I went to an actual dealership, got the deal that afternoon and was happy... 

The next day the salesman phoned our landline while I was at work and asked Mrs Millns if I was still interested. She said something along the lines of "You told him to go and get one somewhere else, so he did and it's on order now". He hung up on her.


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## petebak (Jul 19, 2017)

When I was 18 (in the eighties) I had saved for years to buy a new Capri 2.0 S, went to dealer and was told "can you afford this as you are only 18!!"

I said yes and it will be cash, he then said "stolen it have you?"

Left the dealer and went straight to the Opel dealer and brought a Manta GTE, Dealer couldnt have been more helpful, paid in cash and when I collected it I went straight to the Ford dealer and asked to see the manager.

Told him that I had brought the Manta outside and the only reason I didnt buy a Capri was the attitude of his salesman, explained it all in front of said salesman who looked dumbfounded.

He was sacked on the spot, so I had the last laugh.


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

millns84 said:


> Don't think mine will compare to most on the thread, but here goes...
> 
> I walk into a well known dealership around the time the new Panda was released, show interest and sit down to talk prices/monthly payments. I'm already aware of a deal Fiat have on their website and suggest monthly payments in line with that. The salesman entered negotiations £70 per month higher and the best he could do was £30 per month higher (bearing in mind its a cheap little car so that's a fair bit).
> 
> ...


I had exact same with a Seat Ibiza Aberdeen dealer would not match the deals on the Seat website as he could sell them for £2k more and why would you not do that, went to another dealer got even better deal and then you know the call:lol:


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

petebak said:


> When I was 18 (in the eighties) I had saved for years to buy a new Capri 2.0 S, went to dealer and was told "can you afford this as you are only 18!!"
> 
> I said yes and it will be cash, he then said "stolen it have you?"
> 
> ...


:lol: That takes things to whole new level that does but does not surprise me in the least.

I have to say I could not believe reading your post as I spent 18 months working all hours doing work to save for a New Manta GTE I got white Coupe put on the twin headlight conversion and did some extra skirts at the back, the fun that was had in that car was fantastic, Scottish mountain roads in the winter going sking:driver:

The Brakes were the only thing they seemed to fail to include with the car:lol:, I have been looking to buy one to restore, I had the 1.9 old style white with black roof when I passed my test was 19 when got the GTE.

What colour did you go for?


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## petebak (Jul 19, 2017)

Derekh929 said:


> :lol: That takes things to whole new level that does but does not surprise me in the least.
> 
> I have to say I could not believe ready your post as I spent 18 months working all hours doing work to save for a New Manta GTE I got white Coupe put on the twin headlight conversion and did some extra skirts at the back, the fun that was had in that car was fantastic, Scottish mountain roads in the winter going sking:driver:
> 
> ...


I went for the gold one, kept it all original, and loved the thing, seen a couple round my way recently and left me wanting one again for nostalgia reasons.


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

petebak said:


> I went for the gold one, kept it all original, and loved the thing, seen a couple round my way recently and left me wanting one again for nostalgia reasons.


So you had the gold wheels and Beige Recaro seats? I had two white ones coupe and hatch one with the Beige seats won with the grey, they were great, I lost out on i200 for under 10k just 18 months ago when nobody want a manta


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## petebak (Jul 19, 2017)

Derekh929 said:


> So you had the gold wheels and Beige Recaro seats? I had two white ones coupe and hatch one with the Beige seats won with the grey, they were great, I lost out on i200 for under 10k just 18 months ago when nobody want a manta


Yep thats the one, looking back now it was fine, but would never have gold wheels these days, but hey it was the eighties!!

This was the car I really started getting the detailing bug, and was always immaculate,
sold it 3 years later for a 944 turbo in guards red, and insurance back then was only £200 fully comp, now at that age probably £3k.


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

petebak said:


> Yep thats the one, looking back now it was fine, but would never have gold wheels these days, but hey it was the eighties!!
> 
> This was the car I really started getting the detailing bug, and was always immaculate,
> sold it 3 years later for a 944 turbo in guards red, and insurance back then was only £200 fully comp, now at that age probably £3k.


Holy god 944 turbo maybe the salesman was right about robbing banks

Had the pleasure of driving a new 944 turbo owned by the skipper of a fishing vessel is was on, was E reg I loved it and yes it did 160mph:lol:
was dare I say it wine colour what ever that is in Porsche terms, yes Insurance cheap back then for sure


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## petebak (Jul 19, 2017)

Derekh929 said:


> Holy god 944 turbo maybe the salesman was right about robbing banks
> 
> Had the pleasure of driving a new 944 turbo owned by the skipper of a fishing vessel is was on, was E reg I loved it and yes it did 160mph:lol:
> was dare I say it wine colour what ever that is in Porsche terms, yes Insurance cheap back then for sure


No to robbing banks, just taught by my late father that working hard gets you what you want in life, and never take credit!
worked on his building sites at 13 in school holidays (you could in the days before all the current rules etc) gave me great work ethic, and the sense of achievement when you buy things you have saved hard for, then I got married and divorced and remarried, so not quite so well off now, but still ok BMW 4 Cabrio and Evoque so cant complain, just not the Ferrari I was saving hard for!!!!


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

petebak said:


> No to robbing banks, just taught by my late father that working hard gets you what you want in life, and never take credit!
> worked on his building sites at 13 in school holidays (you could in the days before all the current rules etc) gave me great work ethic, and the sense of achievement when you buy things you have saved hard for, then I got married and divorced and remarried, so not quite so well off now, but still ok BMW 4 Cabrio and Evoque so cant complain, just not the Ferrari I was saving hard for!!!!


Yes my dad was hard on me with work ethic I started making car trailers out of old caravans when about 13 as well sold the alu for scape then used old wood and old bed frame metal for frame and sides made a good few.
Then onto repairing cars and fitting stereo's, I bought a mK1 capri at 14 did it up sold to my sister , then dare I say it Fiat Twin cam the orange one with fancy name then sold it to get manta 1.9 to learn to drive.
Everything I did back then I never got nothing from my dad unless I worked for it harsh as it sounds trying to do this with my kids as been very hard


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## petebak (Jul 19, 2017)

Derekh929 said:


> Yes my dad was hard on me with work ethic I started making car trailers out of old caravans when about 13 as well sold the alu for scape then used old wood and old bed frame metal for frame and sides made a good few.
> Then onto repairing cars and fitting stereo's, I bought a mK1 capri at 14 did it up sold to my sister , then dare I say it Fiat Twin cam the orange one with fancy name then sold it to get manta 1.9 to learn to drive.
> Everything I did back then I never got nothing from my dad unless I worked for it harsh as it sounds trying to do this with my kids as been very hard


Same here, nothing given, not even pocket money unless we worked for it, hated it at the time, but once you see the money grow, then go when you buy something you realise the value of money.

Never gave my kids pocket money unless they worked now 21 and 18, off at uni and both have jobs in the times they are not studying, boy now has £4k saved for his first car and insurance costs (have not told him we are buying car for him, not a new one though, as we want him to keep the money for house deposit at some point)

It is harder these days though


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

petebak said:


> Same here, nothing given, not even pocket money unless we worked for it, hated it at the time, but once you see the money grow, then go when you buy something you realise the value of money.
> 
> Never gave my kids pocket money unless they worked now 21 and 18, off at uni and both have jobs in the times they are not studying, boy now has £4k saved for his first car and insurance costs (have not told him we are buying car for him, not a new one though, as we want him to keep the money for house deposit at some point)
> 
> It is harder these days though


This is getting unreal mine 18 & 20 young lad just away to uni both work as life guards since age 15 and they had to save for deposit for cars and then we gave them intrest free loan and daughters all paid and son more than half paid in first year. Was hard as all their mates did not pay for their cars I believe or so im told, but hey they appreciate them more and tell people the cars theirs


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## RaceGlazer (Jan 10, 2007)

Insurance on my 944Turbo is £230...


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## CaptainKirk95 (Jun 27, 2013)

My sister has just moved to Dubai a couple of weeks ago and asked me to get rid of her car for her, a 2015 Alfa Romeo Giulietta. We decided to sell it to Available car as they offered a really good price for it so she said yes.

Anyway, me and my dad take it, as they're valuing the car we had a walk around the site and then see a salesman with a young couple looking at one of them Hyundai suv's he opens the boot and explains

"Its got a big boot and its really great for keeping things you usually keep in the boot" 

We just look at each other and think whats he on


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

CaptainKirk95 said:


> My sister has just moved to Dubai a couple of weeks ago and asked me to get rid of her car for her, a 2015 Alfa Romeo Giulietta. We decided to sell it to Available car as they offered a really good price for it so she said yes.
> 
> Anyway, me and my dad take it, as they're valuing the car we had a walk around the site and then see a salesman with a young couple looking at one of them Hyundai suv's he opens the boot and explains
> 
> ...


:lol: Maybe he is mates with Dexter


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## GleemSpray (Jan 26, 2014)

This is a great thread Derek :thumb:


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## Shug (Jul 13, 2007)

Me: Has this car had a rear end bump?
Salesman: Of course not, why would you say that.
Me: Vauxhall is spelled wrong on the boot lid.
Salesman: errrrrrrrr


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## DrEskimo (Jan 7, 2016)

Shug said:


> Me: Has this car had a rear end bump?
> Salesman: Of course not, why would you say that.
> Me: Vauxhall is spelled wrong on the boot lid.
> Salesman: errrrrrrrr


Haha! :lol:


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## Paul04 (Jul 26, 2013)

Shug said:


> Me: Has this car had a rear end bump?
> Salesman: Of course not, why would you say that.
> Me: Vauxhall is spelled wrong on the boot lid.
> Salesman: errrrrrrrr


:lol:

Love this thread!


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

Walked into showroom to look at a new car salesman came over how can I help you? me what's the best you could do on that car for me on straight purchase, salesman I will have to speak to my sales manager,
me I say fine I will wait, salesman but he is not available today so I will give you my best price ok then and he quotes a high price and I say no good and walk out.
I then phoned the garage and said I was looking to buy 3 new cars for my company could I speak to the sales Manager so next I know call passed to sales manager and I said to him can you hold please I have someone that wants to speak to you, and I walked back into the dealer and said I have someone on the phone for him.
You should have seen his face when the sales manager spoke to him:lol:


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## possul (Nov 14, 2008)

I've beard one of the vw salesman tell a potential customer "well it's not a vw is it"
They didn't stick around, neither did the salesman, he was pants, thought the cars should sell themselves and he just arranged finance


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## GleemSpray (Jan 26, 2014)

Let a VW salesman use their car finder system, but suspiciously, he wouldn't let me see the screen at all.

He found the right car, right age and right colour and he (suspiciously !) wrote all the details down and slid them across the desk to me.

I said i was interested and would think about it and went home. Later that night, i put the details and mileage into Google and up popped an advert for an identical car with exactly identical mileage at another branch of the same VW stealer-ship about 20 miles away ....... only it was £1500 cheaper.

So rang the showroom and said i would have the car and could you send me reg details so i could arrange insurance.

Yes - it was the same registration number.

Arranged to go back into the showroom and finalise purchase and went armed with printouts of the sharp practice, which i showed to the sales manager.

He gave the salesman a look of "_Damm you for letting yourself get caught like this....You need extra scam training _" and then said "lets find you a car at a price that will make you happy" and he showed me the car finder screen as he used it and i got a generous trade in and some goodies bundled in foc and a 30% discount on any accessories i wanted to buy with the car.

Gits !


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## petebak (Jul 19, 2017)

Wow thats good, how old are you and is it a restricted mileage insurance, mine was for 15,000 miles a year way back then, had a boxster S a couple of years back and that was £360 for me and wife fc/protected ncd and 6k per year, we are both 51 and never any points at all and no accidents.


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## Taxboy (Aug 23, 2006)

When I was looking for my used BMW the salesman looked on his group list and told me I wouldn't get what I wanted anywhere for my budget. Despite the BMW authorised used site showing at least 5 models around the country matching. When I got home I searched his group and what he actually meant was we haven't got anything to sell you.

He also tried to sell me a new car but couldn't match drive the deal despite them both having the same owner. His final last ditch was to tell me if I used drive the deal I might have to collect the car from a garage 2 hours away. I told him for a £1500 saving I could probably live with that !

Sent from my XT1032 using Tapatalk


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## JB052 (Mar 22, 2008)

Sold it this morning Sir
But I phoned only an hour ago you said it was still available.
Can I view the car while I'm here.
Its not actually on site at the moment Sir.
7 - days later car still showing as being available on their website.
Good old VW, nothing learnt from Diesel-gate....still lying.


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

JB052 said:


> Sold it this morning Sir
> But I phoned only an hour ago you said it was still available.
> Can I view the car while I'm here.
> Its not actually on site at the moment Sir.
> ...


Merc were the same with a few i asked about car on approved used as demo told its sold called back a week later as still showing told it would be in on Monday as was sales managers demo car, Monday past, and complained told they never ever had the car it was another dealers:doublesho


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## Sam534 (May 10, 2017)

Went to test drive a gt86 and the guy said let's go onto the motorway, I said I'd prefer the back roads, he said sure why not! 

We only came back as the petrol tank was nearly empty and when we got back he finished with `this used to be my car I'll show you how it's done' by taking it round the roundabouts of the industrial estate sideways.. 

Safe to say I bought an 86 but not that 86.

Sent from my STF-L09 using Tapatalk


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## wayne451 (Aug 15, 2016)

About 30 years ago I was selling Dagenham dustbins and some young upstart walks in eyeing up one of the cars in his black and white striped top and black eye mask, asking for a price waving these ink-stained notes about.

It had been on the radio that a security van had been held up earlier, so I asked him if the money is stolen?

Clearly rumbled he scarpered off in a huff.

Later on this Manta GTE rocks up in the carpark with the door lock prized out and the wiring under the dash twisted together.

He proceeded to tell the sales manager that he'd gone for a Manta as I'd called him out. I was sacked on the spot.

I had the last laugh though, I went and worked at a Ferrari dealership and shopped the little upstart to the Police. He ended up doing a 3 year stretch for TWOC...


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## muzzer (Feb 13, 2011)

Went into Ford dealers a while back,looking for a brochure for a Focus ST Estate.
Asked the sales bod and got this
"do you have a brochure for the ST Estate?"
"nope"
"have you looked?'
"yep and nope, not got none"
So i left and went across to BMW who couldn't have been any better. Had all but decided on BMW's when we decided that that sort of money was a touch high and looked elsewhere.
Got a good deal on a Qashqai for the wife and i thought...hmmmm....Focus RS.
Now i thought, surely they can't still be that bad, can they?
Rang them up
'Hi, do you by any chance have a Focus RS..the new one..i could come look round? Even if it's a customer car, i wont touch it just want to look at it'
'No idea mate, ask the sales team'
'Are they free?'
'No idea mate, i'll get one to call you back'
Took my number and i'm still waiting for them to call back.

Bought my current car and low and behold, 2 days later a transporter turned up at Ford with a demonstrator RS on it.

Peugeot might not be to everyone's taste but at least they were interested enough to find me a demonstrator and then find me a car in the spec i wanted ahead of schedule.


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## ardandy (Aug 18, 2006)

Someone I spoke to through my channel questioned why his service receipt for his Leaf showed oil and an oil filter! Guy said it's part of the service!

FFS!


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## Luke M (Jul 1, 2013)

Not a salesman but some years ago when my VW was in for servicing a day after new front disks and pads had a call from VW. I remember the ladies name was Beryl.

Beryl: Hi Mr M, your car is almost done but we're just calling to advise the brakes need replacing.
Me: oh really which ones?
Beryl: the near side brakes
Me: are you sure?
Beryl: yes that's what I've been told.
Me: Beryl please go and ask a mechanic if the brakes wear only on one side of a car and call me back.

Beryl calls back.

Beryl: Hi Mr M. Apologies it's the off side brakes.
Me: Beryl you're being silly now. I know brakes don't go on one side of the car and in fact the fronts were only done yesterday.
Beryl: oh ok. I'll let him know not to do them but you will need to pay us for brake fluid and to put your old brakes back on since we've already started.
Me: (calmly) I'm on the way. Make sure your manager is available to chat.

Idiots.


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## Bristle Hound (May 31, 2009)

The Best Lines You've Heard from Car Salesman?

'Thats the best deal I can do. Honestly' :lol:

That line always makes me leave the showroom ...


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## MagpieRH (May 27, 2014)

Having gone into the dealership with a price from elsewhere for the same vehicle, which I'd told them about in advance:
Salesperson (all cheerful) "Altogether that comes to £x"
Me "...but that's £500 more than this for the same car"
SP "Well, yeah but you get the metallic paint" 
(I hadn't specified I wanted that, they were offering the showroom model)
SP "do you really want to go up North for £500?!"
(the other dealer was in Newcastle)
Me "Yes! Train ticket for £50, day up North visiting family, and even a tank of fuel back down leaves me better off"
SP shuffles off to speak to manager again, 3rd time in about 20 minutes
SP (now thoroughly grumpy) "OK, we'll do it."

Needless to say, I went elsewhere and bought something else entirely :lol:


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

I think I need another thread to cover service and warranty claims I have some great ones:lol:

My favourite is always when fault on new car it's a characteristic of the car:lol:


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## MagpieRH (May 27, 2014)

Derekh929 said:


> I think I need another thread to cover service and warranty claims I have some great ones:lol:
> 
> My favourite is always when fault on new car it's a characteristic of the car:lol:


They do come out with some gold

A few years ago, my dad took his car in for service at the local Ford dealer. He replaced the wiper blades the day before, because they were worn.
Guess what he was told when they phoned up...


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

ardandy said:


> Someone I spoke to through my channel questioned why his service receipt for his Leaf showed oil and an oil filter! Guy said it's part of the service!
> 
> FFS!


:lol:


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## Chris9980 (Nov 2, 2014)

Years back, we made enquiries to car giant about an smax, the misses spoke to salesperson over the phone after doing an on line valuation on px and a deal was done, or so we thought!! 

Another poor cow had gone up to Birmingham to collect the car and bring it down to Surrey, we were now dealing with her as the original guy was off and she dropped the bombshell that they couldn't actually do the of value and had just wiped £1k off, but don't worry we can put that amount on finance for you!! 

Yeah right, with that we got up and walked out, her face looking back was a picture, did feel sorry for her for having gone all that way for nothing but don't just expect someone to just roll over and give you a grand for you changing your mind, was a wasted evening but we then bought a better model we thought we'd discounted so did us a favour really!!


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## GleemSpray (Jan 26, 2014)

Derekh929 said:


> I think I need another thread to cover service and warranty claims I have some great ones
> 
> My favourite is always when fault on new car it's a characteristic of the car


One that i heard from a wealthy and serious car enthusiast, who had put his expensive car into an expensive workshop for a standard service :

Stealership: "your shock absorbers need replacing because they are leaking"

Customer :"no they are not and no they dont"

Stealership: "we can show you on the ramp"

Customer :"they were replaced not long ago! how about you wipe them clean and service the car properly, or i will call trading standards down to your workshop, get them to take a sample of the oil leak and test it to see if it is the same as the oil inside the shock absorber?"

Stealership: "Oh sorry, we rang you by mistake. Your car is fine, its another customers car that is leaking."

Sent from my HTC 10 using Tapatalk


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

GleemSpray said:


> One that i heard from a wealthy and serious car enthusiast, who had put his expensive car into an expensive workshop for a standard service :
> 
> Stealership: "your shock absorbers need replacing because they are leaking"
> 
> ...


The good old can't better than a quick fit fitter oil rag trick , oh yes getting tyre repair had this tried on me, I was not impressed then they said brake pads needed replacing no they did not utter con merchants


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## ollienoclue (Jan 30, 2017)

How is this stuff tolerated today?

Seriously. I understand that you can earn good money from selling cars, can't you just do it by being honest, genuine and not trying to view customers as walking ATM machines with no brains?

I am in totally the wrong profession. If this is the average level of service from these muppets, I would be near God-like.


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## petebak (Jul 19, 2017)

ollienoclue said:


> How is this stuff tolerated today?
> 
> Seriously. I understand that you can earn good money from selling cars, can't you just do it by being honest, genuine and not trying to view customers as walking ATM machines with no brains?
> 
> I am in totally the wrong profession. If this is the average level of service from these muppets, I would be near God-like.


Snap!!

Will it ever change, probably not in my lifetime


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## bradleymarky (Nov 29, 2013)

I drove 40 miles to view a car i wanted and after the test drive and refusing to buy Guardx for the fifth time he told me how much my part ex was worth, he quoted £1000 less than anywhere else so i got up and left without saying another word.

The phone rings at 8pm and its the salesman telling me that he`d put the wrong registration in for my car and he can now offer me the price i wanted.


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## millns84 (Jul 5, 2009)

Post about the shock absorbers just reminded me of an incident around 6 years ago. Not a dealership, but a local garage that were quite good and that I trusted up to that point.

At the time, I had a V6 Cougar and it was in for a standard service. I had discs/pads all round about a week earlier at another garage (dad's mate did it for parts only). 

I went to pick up the car and...

Mechanic - "Your rear pads are looking a bit low, you might want to book in for them in the next few weeks".

Me - "They were new at the start of the month" (bear in mind that the brakes were gleaming and clearly new).

Mechanic - "Oh right, have you noticed any sound like they might be sticking?"

Me - "No, I've done 200 miles since and they look new"

Mechanic - "Ah, maybe the pads on them just look a little low from new then"


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

millns84 said:


> Post about the shock absorbers just reminded me of an incident around 6 years ago. Not a dealership, but a local garage that were quite good and that I trusted up to that point.
> 
> At the time, I had a V6 Cougar and it was in for a standard service. I had discs/pads all round about a week earlier at another garage (dad's mate did it for parts only).
> 
> ...


It just gives the honest garages a bad name there are good ones out there, but we mainly only here about the bad


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## Andyblue (Jun 20, 2017)

Years ago, father n law bought an Audi 80 - lovely car, very well cared for, full main dealer service history, 1 lady owner and every bill was with the car. Needless to say he was very happy with it.

Roll on 9-12 months, service required and as he did them all himself, bought stuff required and set about it, no issues until it came to change the points - invoices shown these had been changed at ever service - took him a while and then confirmed what he thought - car had electronic ignition and no points...


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## kingswood (Jun 23, 2016)

ever wondered why some franchises have obscure numbers at the end of the value? 

ie £7893 or £9877 etc? 

the last digit usually represents the number of weeks the cars been with them, they have to sell within 10 or it gets traded within the dealerships and they lose out.

always good to help get a bargain ;-)


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## Caledoniandream (Oct 9, 2009)

Met over the years fantastic salesmen who had the gift of the gab. 
if you can rip me off (relative) and make me feel like I have a good deal, than fair play. 

I met very homest salesmen, who just without BS stapped out the deal, because they couldn't match it, and didn't lie about, just told straight where they where coming from, fair play. 
Next time I will give you another chance!

the ones who don't have a clue and just try to BS their way through it, you make me laugh, but don't underestimate me, that will be your downfall. 

The rude ones, met one while we where looking for a car: "if you don't finance than we are not interested", funny enough his boss was very interested later on the phone, and this "super sales man" is not working there anymore. 

The unriliable ones, "yeah we have that car in stock" and you turn up, and it was just sold, but thye have another one, just forget it mate, if you had said that in the first place on the phone, I maybe would consider to look at it, but if you lie about that, what will you lie about next?

The "frozen" price deals, where they can offer you a set of mats, but are not willing to consider a bid (reasonable) on the car, or are not willing to move on your PE. 

Got some bride light, eying up my wife's car, and made the really impresive statement: "I hope you are not trading that in, we are not interested"
Listen mate, I haven't even looked at your cars, haven't even talked about PE, haven't even mentioned it. 
What is that all about. 

Many Salesmen need to do a course in conversation, being polite and buid up relationships, before they even should be allowed to talk to a member of the public. 
You are not doing me a favour, my money is good anywhere, I may do you a favour and buy a car. 
Don't lie, if you are not sure, say so, nobody knows everything.


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## B8sy (Dec 6, 2014)

I had a guy do the classic, I'm not interested in your car for a part ex, I wasnt planning on so my offended response was, don't worry I know you don't know how to sell a car anyway so didn't think you would want it. He was enjoyably offended as well. LOL

Sent from my EVA-L09 using Tapatalk


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## Derekh929 (Aug 28, 2011)

B8sy said:


> I had a guy do the classic, I'm not interested in your car for a part ex, I wasnt planning on so my offended response was, don't worry I know you don't know how to sell a car anyway so didn't think you would want it. He was enjoyably offended as well. LOL
> 
> Sent from my EVA-L09 using Tapatalk


:lol: Must be the greatest way to shot yourself in the foot, problem is if you ask some good salesman they will tell you that most don't even question the price and pay asking, I though more people was all into taking their online drive the deal , car wow and coast 2 coast quotes into dealer? seems that's not the case local here


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## Big Bri (Nov 20, 2010)

Been selling for over 30yrs now.Mostly cars .Worked for well known dealers mainly and small specialist centers. I generally find the lairs[harsh i know] are sat the other side of the desk.I dont presume at all in saying that.Made that mistake years ago.I have won customer service awards voted by my customers. All-sorts of stuff similar.Made a good living for many,many years.We are so heavly regulated by FSA,and similar organisations these days its almost impossible to miss sell*.That said,*it does go on and is usually down to lack of training,experience or like any industry,society in general. Ther are people who are good and people who are bad.With everyone in-between.

BB


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## uggski (Jun 29, 2016)

Big Bri said:


> Been selling for over 30yrs now.Mostly cars .Worked for well known dealers mainly and small specialist centers. I generally find the lairs[harsh i know] are sat the other side of the desk.I dont presume at all in saying that.Made that mistake years ago.I have won customer service awards voted by my customers. All-sorts of stuff similar.Made a good living for many,many years.We are so heavly regulated by FSA,and similar organisations these days its almost impossible to miss sell*.That said,*it does go on and is usually down to lack of training,experience or like any industry,society in general. Ther are people who are good and people who are bad.With everyone in-between.
> 
> BB


The problem is that there seems to be way more bad salesmen than good as well as the chancers. You are right. There are some very good sales guys, no one is disputing that. It's just a pity youe are so badly outnubered. 

We bought our car through CarWow. We got a discount of just over £4000 on a Nissan Juke. When I spoke to the salesman about it he was frank about the fact that we got a good deal because they were well below target for that month and needed to get some sales. He also said that they take a chance on this as if they do not make target they don't get the rebate from Nissan. He was excellent to deal with and I would go back.

When i went to a more local dealer he just said they would not meet any deal set up by CarWow. Fair enough. I took my business to the original dealership.


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## Darlofan (Nov 24, 2010)

Arranged a test drive for a Monday morning. Turned up at 10.30am, car was there ready. Sales girl got the keys, opened the car excusing the state of it because "a sales guy had used it over weekend to go mountain biking." Rear seats were still folded flat and boot and footwells were full of mud.
Now I'm fully aware cars get used by previous owners and sales people but if they couldn't make an effort to get it cleaned before I turned up then I couldn't be bothered buying it.


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## Taxboy (Aug 23, 2006)

Some salesmen fail because they don't leave themselves an escape route. I booked for a test drive in Jag XF 3.0 and we agreed my budget would be for a s/h pre facelift model.

I turn up at the dealer in my lunch hour and the salesman was off sick. Anyway I get a replacement who asks how I will be buying. Cash I replied and I then got oh we have to fill in a finance questionnaire for you its the FSA rules !! Anyway get past that hurdle by telling him don't want to pay more than £20 a month so computer says no to a finance deal.

He then goes on to say could probably do me a deal on a new 2.2 close to my budget and just think the 3.0 is old tech inside you wouldn't want that would you. Adds they run 2.2 on the courtesy fleet and the 3.0 owners say they couldn't tell the difference. So after much badgering and needing to get back to work I take a 2.2 out.

It didn't really do it for me at which point he said I've got a 3.0 in stick for about your money. How about that ? To which I said based on your advice its old tech so I wouldn't want that.

I guess they don't always listen plus I generally want the product to sell itself rather than the salesman. In fact the more they push the more entrenched I become.

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## Taxboy (Aug 23, 2006)

Also forgot to add the classic line. Its got a really good boot will take a full set of golf clubs no problem. To which I replied that must be handy if you play golf !

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