# I used to have a brother...



## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

... but now I have a sister!!! My youngest brother came out to us all recently about how he'd been feeling and his struggle with his gender identity. He recently decided to start living full time the way he always thought he should be.

So I present my little sister Sasha; I can't believe how happy she is and how much more relaxed and calm and excited about life she is right now. She starts on hormones soon and is starting to turn her life around. She's retraining to become a beauty therapist (she's an IT tech at the moment) and she couldn't be happier. I'm very proud of her and even more protective than before as the eldest of the 4 of us and we were 4 boys but I always wanted a sister. Now I have one I can scare the boys away from her haha







I think she has been so brave to just come out with her whole new life plan and just carry on as normal. It's odd because I am so much closer to her now than before but I'm quite protective of her anyway. There's 10 years between us so I'm quite a bit older but I think she's wiser haha.

Now just gotta get her out of her 2 year old 508sw for something more reliable lol  Love ya Sash haha :lol:


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## stangalang

I guess in situations like this, personal preferences much be pushed aside. I cant imagine how difficult it is to A) deal with feeling this way B) come out to the people you love the most C) settle down in her new role. Also, i can not possibly imagine the relief she must have felt. 

So live and let live, and good luck. The more happy people we have in the world, the better we all will be.


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## muzzer

You know what, fair play to Sasha for choosing to live her life her way. So many people who want to come out seem to end up suffering in silence and/or taking their own lives so bravo to her for having the courage to follow her heart. I applaud her and wish her all the best.


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## DJ X-Ray

Wow! That must have been a bombshell man.

Although, no doubt you probably had an inkling somewhere along the line. Must be a relief for your br, ahem, sis  To finally be who she wants to be.

Good on you for taking it as well as you seem to be.

I like to think i would too, blood is blood at the end of the day.However,none of my brothers ain't good looking enough for that caper, I'm the only hunk out of us 

All the best.


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## cossiecol

Better to be happy than to go through life being miserable.

Hope Sasha is now happy within her self rather than feeling trapped!


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## BrummyPete

Very brave move and fair play to her, you have to be happy in life and do whatever you can to make that happen.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Cheers fellas  Yeah looking back she's always been a little uncomfortable in her role; she never had youngest child syndrome (That was my other brother, the third one of us) and she's always been a bit quieter than us too. When she was in primary school she always used to play with the girls and with their toys, she has never been one for being boyish. You accept your family for who they are and I've always had a bond with her I don't have with my other brothers. They are quite close in age; I'm 31 (Jeeez I'm old haha), they are 26 and 24 so quite close and Sash is 21. The middle two look after each other so I've always had more to do with Sash than they have.

I'm just so happy she's found what makes her happy and is living how she always should have instead of bottling it up for evermore, I suppose she's always known but thought it would go away. She rung me in tears 4 months ago to tell me how she felt. I rushed over to her and sat with her going through everything. She told me how she felt and said she was sorry! I told her off for being sorry! Why should she be? I told her I'd get Mum & Dad round and we'd all work with her and be there every step of the way for her.

It's easy to accept tbh as you see instant relief and change. She is so much more comfortable and lively now than she ever was. I think she's very pretty and feminine anyway and she starts HRT very soon. She's a strong girl though and I have no doubt now she'll be happy. Her big worry was how the family would react but it's no difference to us, everybody's just taken it for what it is; she's always been female, she was just born with a plumbing defect so why should anyone tell her she's wrong when it's nature that's wrong! Everyone else, all her friends and the world she just came out and was like this is the new me, take it or leave it!

I've taught LGBT kids before at school so I've got some experience of it and one of my best friends is Non-Binary trans, so is gender fluid and doesn't use male or female pronouns. Sash is Binary Trans as her gender is female so she fits in the category.

She's an amazing person and I love her either way; so does my little one! It's ironic as she has a tattoo on her back which I always thought was very Sash but now has real relevance. It's psalm 23 verse 4. Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. There's isn't a better phrase to describe her!


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## Sicskate

Good for her 

A bit of honestly here (I don't mean to offend) but I only opened the thread because there was a picture of a fit girl in the thumb nail


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Haha; I think that's the kind of compliment she'd like to hear  Like I said, I think she's very pretty anyway as she is so the HRT is only going to help. I'll be beating lads away from her lol.

I have my 'rules for dating my sister' T-Shirt on order


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## Stu Mac

Wow that must of been hard for your family let alone your sister!
Delighted to hear that she is happy and can now start living her life the way she wanted.


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## James_R

You sound like a great brother cookiemonster :thumb:

Nice to hear Sasha has her eldest brother looking out for her.
Probably finds her decision to go on as she wants to go on easier knowing she has this sort of support from family.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Thanks mate  I try my best with all of them but the middle 2 are as thick as thieves haha, she is the closest to me and she lives closest to me in a house I rent to her so I'm always around and about. She also loves being an Auntie so she's always around mine and my fiancée has been amazing with her, taking her out shopping for a new wardrobe while she is on maternity  

I don't think anyone's had a problem with it, or if they have they've been very quiet about it. Our parents have been really good about it too and our other brothers and their partners have really taken to her, like I said to them both and they agreed, she is so much more at home in herself than she ever has been. It's a relief tbh that she's had the strength to be honest and live how she feels she should instead of hiding it. At 21 she's got many years ahead of her so I'm over the moon for her. We've had many a heart to heart over it and I've always been her shoulder to cry on even when we were young.

I can't describe how very proud I am of her neither can I get over how good she looks!!! SWMBO always says how amazing her figure is and how jealous she is. I have to remind the boss she gave birth 11 weeks ago and looks pretty fine herself haha


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## Rob74

I take my hat of to her m8 
We have a friend who went through the transaction at about 40. Being involved to a certain degree we saw the instant relief but also how accepting people are when they had it explained.

I wish Sasha all the best for the future & may she have the love & happiness we all deserve.


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## PaulaJayne

She is a pretty girl and will make a wonderful woman - 

Great brother she has as well.


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## Cookies

That must have been a difficult choice for her but it's bound to have made it a lot easier having your support and love CM. 

Please wish her all the best for the future, but she'll be just fine with you about. 

Cooks


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## bigeyd

My work colleagues brother is having the op on the 14th,the irony is it takes balls to go through the change.

I hope she is happy


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## Ben108

Wow, what a fantastic brother and a brave sister! I remember when my sister came out as a lesbian, shed already spoken to me about it and thought we were all going to judge her!! 

It must be a very hard thing to do, and more so for your sister but proud of her I'd be, a human is a human at the end of the day, regardless of who or what they want to be.


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## svended

Good luck to her. It's a long journey but I hope the transition is as smooth as possible. 
It takes a strong person to say 'this is not who I am or what I am', so the hardest part is over. 
Glad to hear your a protective older brother because she's going to need all the support and understanding you can give.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Thanks for all the posts of support! I've shown her the thread and she is so grateful to you all for your kind words and encouragement. I just wonder how people fail to accept it?!? It baffles me, I mean, she's my little sister, how could I not accept her for who she is? I think people are people and I never discriminate, not with gender, race, creed, sexual orientation, none of it matters, it's who we are inside that counts and Sash is an awesome person. She's done so much for me too and we look out for each other in my family, we are all very close.

I don't think I'm doing anything special or different tbh, I'd like to think other people in her position would get the same support but I realise they don't from my teaching experience and what some of my pupils have told me over the years. But whatever happens, Sash has got us all behind her and a whole load of other people too and you can barely tell; she's a very pretty girl anyway so I'm sure in 6 or so months time nobody would ever know any different!


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## No04BLE

My girlfriends daughter just informed us that she is dating a girl a few days ago. The look of fear on her face when she told us was worrying. I just gave her a big hug and said if your happy I'm over the moon. Hope your little sister is happy within herself and enjoys her new life.


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## bradleymarky

Nice legs 
As long as she is happy that's the main thing mate.


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## Starbuck88

Live and let live.

I hate all these nutters that think things are 'wrong etc'. If someone isn't hurting anyone one then let them get on with being Gay, Bi, Transgender etc. 

Who cares enough to have to put people down and make them feel worthless, it's sad, really sad.

Hopefully your Sister is going to be MUCH happier now she will live her life the way she's always wanted. 

Brilliant


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## Blueberry

Good for her. I do believe that some people are stuck within the wrong body. Your sister has the strength to do something about it and she is taking the first steps towards a happier life for herself. We only have one life so there's is absolutely no point in being miserable whilst we are here. Live life to the full


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## PaulaJayne

I am going to post this as a big THANKS to ALL the posters on this thread. 

I am amazed at how much society has changed and how positive you all have been towards Sasha.

You all deserve a BIG HUG {{{{{}}}}}

Paula - A girl like Sasha - though a lot longer in the tooth.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Indeed Paula, your support has been overwhelming here, it's great to see so many people accept it and accept people for who they are.

I made the thread because I'm proud of Sash and yeah I want people to know that and know if you feel the same way and you're worried about telling people that you don't have to be! The weight that'll lift off your shoulders is amazing!

I'm over the moon for Sash and I love her to pieces regardless


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## Leno

I think alot of the hate/un- acceptance stems from not understanding. We're all programed to immediately dislike what we don't understand-or it seems that way anyway. 

I know a chap (now chapess) that's recently went through the change and especially for someone my age it was a massive thing to overcome. Society these days is built on what others think so I have massive respect for anyone stepping out and doing what they want to do, regardless of how people will judge. 

Maybe sasha would be willing to share her experence with us at some point? Alot of questions many people have about the subject are no doubt classed as sensitive (so many are afraid to ask!), but are inportant in the whole understanding of it! I personally would love to get a more in depth understanding of what it's like.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

I'll certainly ask her  She's started HRT now and she already looks a little different. She's training her voice so she sounds different now too though she's never had a deep voice so she'll not have long to go before nobody would ever tell she wasn't born this way.

She's changes her name via deed poll now so it's official, all her documents and ID are being changed to show a Miss Sasha Grace Jones (I don't know why she picked the name but I love it and it really suits her) so she's really making progress! You have to live in your new gender role a minimum of 12 months before you can be considered for surgery but she's cool with that and isn't too fussed yet about thinking about surgery. It'll all come when it's ready.

The scary thing is the message I got the other day from her.

I met this guy and I know I said I wouldn't but he's really nice...










* Runs to grab gun!!


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## Andyb0127

Well done sasha for being who you want to be and living your life the way you want. Life should always be doing what makes happy. Sounds. Like your a very close family good for all of you how it should be. :thumb:


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## macc70

If I had legs like that Id be wearing a skirt too. live life to the full


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Haha, yeah she has everyone jealous over those legs! Her Peugeot 508sw is going back soon; she's decided to settle the finance and buy something outright while she is retraining. Sounds good to me (I never liked the 508, hers was just really badly made and has had loads of things done under warranty!) so I've got my eye out for an R56 Mini Cooper S which is what she wants so we shall see what I can find. Hopefully her car search will be easier than mine!!


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## phillipnoke

Good luck to her in her new life


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Thought I'd update this a little as Sash has moved on a little in her transition, she's been on hormones about 5 months now and nearly finished have laser sessions on her face (she tells me they are very painful, more painful than a tattoo so I do pity her!!) she's had her GIC referral through and now all her ID, passport, driving licence, NI number everything has been updated. That's a long process; in fact there's some stuff my wife hasn't updated yet after the wedding and that was nearly a year ago now haha!

Also changed is her hair extensions and colour though she wants to go grey next. I keep telling her she should match my colour which is I like to think 'silver fox' :lol:

Anyway, a recent picture



I swear that's one of my old Ralph Lauren shirts I gave her a few years ago as well!!! God dammit! Still as proud of her as ever and she's still beaming ear to ear and having such an easy transition it's actually a pleasure to watch and be part of with her.


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## Kerr

She's not quite worked out that it's the woman's job to tidy up the mess yet. :lol:


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## President Swirl

Good for Her. Live in technicolour, and leave the blinkered monochrome nonsense in the past.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Kerr said:


> She's not quite worked out that it's the woman's job to tidy up the mess yet. :lol:


Haha, one thing she has never been is tidy!!

I promised to tackle her Clubby for her if she want's to bring it round but I refuse to help with the house even though she blackmails me by reminding me who actually owns the house...


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## NickTB

Great to see you being so proud and protective of her Cooks. I have a friend who went through the same process in work. He (at the time) gradually came out to me (I have a few gay friends and relations, so he saw me as a easier option to talk to) and over the course of a year became Janice. This was all about 10 years ago, and now she's happier than ever living a normal female lifestyle. And happier than anyone I know. It was long and painful process to transition, but now it's all over and done with she's absolutely radiant.
I'm sure your sister realises what an amazing brother you are. It could have been so difficult without your help.


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## happmadison1978

Awesome, you must be very proud of her. Brave decision and I'm sure you're absolutely delighted to see the change in her mood.

She's also lucky to have such a great family with no judging and just total complete support. Thanks for sharing this.

Best wishes to you all!

Steve


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## SBM

Only just seen this thread for the first time CokkieMonster.. So humbled and proud of both you and Sasha. Brave and supportive in equal measure. I wish Sasha all the best with her continuing treatment and happiness in being herself. I've sub'd, what a lovely uplifting thread :thumb::thumb:


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## BillyT

sorry not read all the posts Have you told Sasha that you have posted this on a public forum. What does she think about all the reply's.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Thanks all and yeah, told her from the off and she has seen the replies and is very thankful to all of you for your kind words and messages of support 

Like I said, I'd like to think everyone else here would do the same tbh, she's my sister and she's no different to anyone else, just going on a journey not many people get to experience.


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## Perry

As others have said, it must of taken a lot of courage to do and also to say to family members, hat off to her and to you, I hope she now lives life to the full and good luck in her new job.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Well it's been a year since we met Sash for the first time and I have more approved photos to share, I have even been given permission to share a before and after and when you see it this way it's amazing the change in such a short amount of time

Before



After



And from her Birthday last month



She's stepping up her hormone dosage and is waiting to see the consultant at Charing Cross GIC to move forward with the legal side like updating her birth certificate which takes an age apparently so she'll be waiting a while longer for that. She's changed her hair (again) and has had another set of extensions put in. She's always going to need some addition to her hair on the right side due to a big scar from an accident so she now looks very different to before and there's been no invasive procedures yet, of which she is thinking about.

I think she's emerged a very attractive young woman and I'm very proud of her


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## vtaylor78

You are without doubt a top bloke Cookie Monster, great and interesting thread.
Best of luck for the future to Sasha, very brave to say the least.
Regards
Vince.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Cheers buddy, will pass the message on like I do with all of them, the support and acceptance she's received has been overwhelming to us all!


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## Naddy37

I've only just seen this thread. All I can say mate is, you are a top bloke for giving such support and love to your sister. And also to your family too. Some families don't offer that support, and disown their children when they come out as transgender  

You'll have an idea in the sheer hell she went thru, plucking up the courage to 'come out'. 

Some, unfortunately don't get the love & support that you've shown & they have to 'suppress' those feelings until a time is right to take things further, purely for the sake of upsetting family. 

You and your families attitude for the support you've shown offer a glimmer of hope to others going thru/approaching the same issue, in that, someday, they'll accept it.

And no, I'm not posting a picture of me....


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## joey.180sx

As your passing on the messages I'll say a belated happy birthday 😊.


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## CoOkIeMoNsTeR

Cheers guys, I'll pass it on, her Birthday is July 19th and mine is July 29th so there's nearly 10 years between us haha.


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## jonezy

Awesome supportive thread bud, all that matters in life is that she is comfortable in her own skin now! it must of took one hell of a lot of courage to do what she did and the fact you and your family have supported her is amazing to hear!!!


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