# The way you dress linked to how you get treated?



## Estoril-5

Bit of a strange one this weekend, i had a night away with Mrs E-5 this bank holiday just gone and as it was just us and no kids (which we haven't done in a long time) i wanted to make an effort.

So i dressed up in a smart pair of loafer type shoes, smart dark jeans, a shirt and a jumper, none of these were designer, just smart clothes (Clark's shoes, next jeans, Timberland jumper ) i also wore my Seiko limited edition dive watch.

What i noticed from checking into the hotel to going out for dinner etc was the way i was treated. I'm normally a t shirt, jeans and trainers guy but i definitely noticed a difference in the way i was dealt with and being smartly dressed i seemed to receive a better service and more attention.

This got me thinking about an incident last week, i had an appointment at an eye specialist at a private clinic as a private patient (i went through Bupa cover i have at work). I arrived and told the receptionist i had an appointment, she said she couldn't find me on the appointment register. She then asked how i booked the appointment, after showing her the confirmation she said, oh sorry i thought you were an NHS patient, guess what i was wearing t shirt and trainers.

The following week i went back in for a follow up and came straight from work so shirt trousers and shoes, went to reception, differenct receptionist, gave her my appointment time and name and she told to take a seat - guess she checked the private patient list first.

Bit of a revelation the difference in approach and attitude depending on how i was dressed.

Anyone else experienced this?

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## Ultra

Yep, the majority will judge a book by it's cover without having any idea of what's inside.


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## GleemSpray

I once heard a great quote about airlines and hotels, which basically said " _if you dress like a student you get treated like one_ " its so very true...

One thing that i have found is also true in many situations in life, is that its not so much about having expensive clothes and shoes etc, its about looking like you made a big effort to dress - so really clean clothes / shoes / hair / fingernails etc really does alter the way people treat you and their attitude to you.


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## sshooie

People often notice shoes and watches as a marker for wealth, not always right but a good rule of thumb imo.


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## ianrobbo1

As an ex waiter, I can tell you many of the really so called "rich" tend to be pig ignorant and look down their noses at "us plebs" it's not what you wear but the way you conduct yourself that makes a big difference, please, and thank you, tended to get more attention than a "posh" suit,


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## sshooie

Always been a big advocate of treat others as you wish to be treated, regardless of status, colour or creed everyone has respect from me in the first instance.


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## alfajim

Manners maketh the man.


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## Estoril-5

Just to add, in all situations regardless of what I'm wearing I'm always pleasant and make small talk.

Just got treated better when i wore smarter clothes.

I'm sure there must be case studies about this kind of behaviour

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## macca666

There will be Estoril it's called unconscious bias where our brain automatically makes a judgement based on a number of factors. I bet we've all done it where we've assumed something just because of the way a person looks or what they're doing as the majority of time it's out our control and based on personal experience. 

The point is, as you've experienced, is that we shouldn't treat them any differently however unfortunately people still do.


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## DLGWRX02

I'm my wife's worse nightmare when it comes to dress code and dress sense. Because I have none. I wear what I feel like despite if my shirt clashes with my shoes.lol. She's always telling me I'm not going out with you looking like that.lol. I'm like I dress how I can be bothered or what I feel comfortable in. I have to agree with E-5. It does make a difference in how people react to you, one minute I can look like a cast member for benefits street the other an extra from the office (although not very often) but people's attitudes alter just as quick. I'm a live and let live kinda guy I don't offend anyone and don't wish to be offended but it happens, however I just let it go over my head. (Most of the time.lol)


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## bradleymarky

I don't think it matters what clothes you wear. If I had an expensive suit on I'd still get followed around every shop I went it.


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## ollienoclue

There is a huge difference between those having wealth and those who have class.

I can spot either a mile away.

You can tell upmarket kinds of people from how they behave, conduct themselves and generally how they speak.

I would not judge people based on their clothing but I admit I am a stickler for dressing properly, because in my youth I was very much the mud sh1t and tears sort of guy and I very much enjoy wearing a shirt these days.

Watches and shoes are not a particularly good guide, a lot of chavs wear massive big name watches so they aren't such a reliable guide these days.

There are a large number of (apparently) wealthy people around these days but with the days of cheap finance and also new money about it is not always a reliable guide.

The biggest difference I have seen between classes (having grown up in a family who ran a hotel for decades you get used to meeting a lot of vastly different people) is in aspiration and outlook as opposed to how much money they might have.

I do not know what people think of my wife and I, but we don't owe anyone a cent and very much live the lifestyle we hoped for without having to work too hard at it.

I cannot stand pretentiousness, it makes me laugh. I was brought up in part by my mother whom for the first few years of my life was a single parent, so will never look down my nose at anyone or anything.


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## Guitarjon

I think how you are dressed can also change the impression you give out to people in your confidence etc. 

I used to wear suit etc to work. The difference in my suits and my dad's funeral suits were very different (brand, fit etc). However, most of the time these days (no longer need to wear nice suits for work I tend to slum it in some badly fitting tracky bottoms and a t shirt. I'm still the same person but if I walked into the bank wearing the trackies I'd personally feel less confident than I would if I'd walked into the bank a few years ago in my suits, truth is my life has changed I now earn a third of what i did and I look after our son. I'm chilling in trackies as I work long hours at night, chase after my son all day and do housework and my training course in every other spare moment of my life so I need to be flexible. Can't be running round a muddy park in my best clobber.

Yes, I do think what you dress influences what people think of you but what I'm trying to say is that what I dress influences the way I perceive myself and confidence I have.


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## AndyN01

Interesting take on class and wealth.

Several decades ago I was at a small race meeting at Silverstone.

So small everyone could walk round the pits and onto the grid. .

There was a guy there "tinkering" with some lovely historic 1930's ish car in his overalls.

Stopped for a chat, he told me about what he was "fettling" and I wished him well for the day etc.

Nice bloke, getting hands on and hands dirty.

Turned out to be.....

Lord Rothschild.

Books and covers. :thumb: 

Andy.


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## angel1449

im at the point of my life when i dont care what others think, i wear what i want and not bothered how im perceived


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## Caledoniandream

1 is called effort, and it's not all about wealth, and designer goods.
If you make an effort when you meet people to look clean, dressed and well maintained, people appreciate that, and will make effort on their side.

You can try to hard and go with a Hugo Boss suit to the recycling centre and you look a right prick.
It's not about the make of your accessories, but if they are the correct ones.
I have a female friend who looks always perfect, but none of the jewellery she wears cost more than a tenner, but she looks a million dollars. 

It's all about effort, if I go to a meeting and one of the main people cannot make the effort to dress accordingly, than the meeting is doomed, as I will think that he is actually not interested.
And he need to work incredibly hard to proof the me wrong. 

It's all about unconscious bias, it can work for you, or you can take advantage of it.
It's a human thing, and people are full of it, it's where discrimination is build on.
One of my brothers in law is let say of a different skin colour, he is a well known children's psychologist and very wealthy.
He get treated very different for that reason by people who don't know him.
We went somewhere to look at a house and the house owner (an older man) said to him quote: "just keeping clapping your hands, so I know you are stealing anything ":unquote


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## Tricky Red

Yes, I think if you make an effort, then people are more inclined to make an effort back. 

I see so many people who can't be bothered to even dress themselves, looking very shifty. Now, they may have wealth but it means for nothing. And on the subject of class. Some have it, some don't. You can spot it a mile off. Rich idiots with no manner or class really get on my nerves. 

Some people say that it's what's on the inside that matters, but in my opinion, as a stranger, you only get one chance to make a first impression. Make it a decent one.


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## nbray67

*Scenario*

Stratstone Doncaster, 2 dealers 100yds apart.

Cars to view with an intention to buy, new 240i cab and a used F Type cab.

We walk in with casual clothes on, hoodie and trainers etc.....

1) Jag dealer, salesman in his 40's.

2) BMW dealer, salesman in his 20's.

*Based on the above, which salesman do you think treated us like a customer and which one looked us up and down and did not treat us like a customer?*

Easy if you now know what car we drive.


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## nbray67

Caledoniandream said:


> One of my brothers in law is let say of a different skin colour, he is a well known children's psychologist and very wealthy.
> 
> He get treated very different for that reason by people who don't know him.
> We went somewhere to look at a house and the house owner (an older man) said to him quote: "just keeping clapping your hands, so I know you are stealing anything ":unquote


Now that there, is just disgusting.

Please tell me one of you stopped at that point and put this bigoted idiot right?


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## Simz

Kind of similar but different to clothes, I have just come out of a 3 series touring that when i gave way to people or let them through the traffic i would always get a thank you............Skip to my new car a Focus ST mk2 and WOW what a difference people just don't acknowledge me at all, guess they think i must be 12 and in a stolen car.


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## Cookies

nbray67 said:


> *Scenario*
> 
> 1) Jag dealer, salesman in his 40's.
> 
> 2) BMW dealer, salesman in his 20's.


Ok - my guess is that it must be the more experienced sales guy in his 40s, so you bought a Jag. He's probably been around the block enough to know how to gauge a real customer.

Cooks

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## stangalang

The way you dress does not define you, unless you use it that way. But I mean come on, we all do it. If you look scruffy you will initially be treated "scruffy", if you look like a chav you will get treated in a "chav" manor. That doesn't mean you wont be open to quickly changing your opinion when they speak/address you. But first impressions are real and I personally don't think there is anything wrong with that, and I spend 90% of my life in workwear!


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## Kerr

I'd say in most cases that was very much true for most people. You are judged by many people on your appearance and it's not just your choice of clothing. 

I also feel that some choices of clothing are made by people with the intention of giving a certain impression. 

For example(and humour purposes) why do all little skinny blokes who want to look hard all wear Stone Island clothes? Do Stone Island make the shoulders in their clothes so heavy it causes them to walk with their shoulders rocking back and forward? 


I wouldn't turn up for a job interview in my jeans. Wearing a suit and dressing up does make a better impression.


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## GleemSpray

The other important aspect to all of this, is self-image.

If you are confident, assured and strong minded, then you wont care what others think and that will project outwards.

If you doubt your own importance or authority, then you might well try to compensate via particular clothing, because you look or come across as nervous or unsure of yourself.


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## nbray67

Cookies said:


> Ok - my guess is that it must be the more experienced sales guy in his 40s, so you bought a Jag. He's probably been around the block enough to know how to gauge a real customer.
> 
> Cooks
> 
> Sent from my D6603 using Tapatalk


Nope.

The Jag salesman simply looked us up and down when we walked upto the F Type in the showroom. Seemed uninterested when my wife sat in the F Type even though she was gleaming with joy over it.
He had the attitude of 'can you afford it' in my opinion.

Stratstone Jaguar Doncaster. 
No idea of the salesman's name as he never introduced himself or gave us his full attention at any point during our visit to their showroom.

The young BMW salesman was, without a doubt, one of the best salesmen we've ever encountered. Very well dressed, polite, knowledgeable and down to earth in every way.
He was helpful and considerate all the way thru the sale process.
Unlike the Jag salesman, he never gave us the 'can you afford it' body language.

This was Stratstone BMW Doncaster. 
Bahle Mhlanga was the salesman's name if anybody my way ever goes into the BMW dealer.


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## macca666

nbray67 said:


> Nope.
> 
> The Jag salesman simply looked us up and down when we walked upto the F Type in the showroom. Seemed uninterested when my wife sat in the F Type even though she was gleaming with joy over it.
> He had the attitude of 'can you afford it' in my opinion.
> 
> Stratstone Jaguar Doncaster.
> No idea of the salesman's name as he never introduced himself or gave us his full attention at any point during our visit to their showroom.
> 
> The young BMW salesman was, without a doubt, one of the best salesmen we've ever encountered. Very well dressed, polite, knowledgeable and down to earth in every way.
> He was helpful and considerate all the way thru the sale process.
> Unlike the Jag salesman, he never gave us the 'can you afford it' body language.
> 
> This was Stratstone BMW Doncaster.
> Bahle Mhlanga was the salesman's name if anybody my way ever goes into the BMW dealer.


Have to say I would've guessed with Cooks in the Jag salesman. Which is ironic in that the thread is about prejudging and we've both just done exactly that........ :lol::lol::lol:


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## DIESEL DAVE

I`ve always been a ragbag


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## Caledoniandream

nbray67 said:


> Now that there, is just disgusting.
> 
> Please tell me one of you stopped at that point and put this bigoted idiot right?


Let's put it this way, it opened doors for an extreme deal, he quickly and his estate agent, got our point.
And no there was no blackmail involved.


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## ollienoclue

Some dealers are notorious for treating people very badly on initial treatment. It is not linked to brand I assure you.

I have attended many a car dealership with a certain wealthy uncle of mine. He is particularly wealthy but the only give away is the car he arrives in and the Rolex. The rest is Levi jeans and a T shirt type clobber backed up by a Centurion card. He simply doesn't care.

Ignoring the fact that I suspect on initial glance dealership staff invariably must conclude we are a gay couple with me the younger boy toy (always have a little laugh about it), the treatment we have received from various dealers varies. I won't mention them by name but one MB dealer did not like the look of us at all, and one Aston/Jag dealer was appalling. They would not let him test drive an Aston whatsoever unless he was prepared to sign over a £20K deposit and actually order a car, which begs the question as to who the heck buys a car without first test driving one?

Porsche Bournemouth however and Westover sports cars were fantastic but it did help that we were known to them. We discussed this very subject about judging people by their appearance, most experienced non R sole sales people will not do it, precisely because some millionaires dress and act in peculiar ways and so they are wise to it. The classic way to spot a mere tyre kicker from a genuine buyer is to ask questions.

Basically when the customer begins to ask and show interest in a particular car, you quiz them about what they have had before, and what their favourite model was, have they ever considered X or Y etc etc, and you can spot a genuine buyer very readily this way because the experience tells, the vast majority of real performance/prestige car buyers will be at least half informed about the car in question, the try hards wasting your time will be clueless.

If you want a nice dealership experience anyone in the region should pop into Poole Audi. I was there with a relative a couple of years ago, and the cars were literally walking out the door it was so busy. We deliberately gave the young attractive woman on the reception desk some jovial but minor chauvinist grief, and one of the younger sales chaps could not have been more helpful, within seconds coffee had arrived on the desk and about 10 minutes later we were negotiating whilst sat in the nearest convertible A4. He did his damnedest to sell a couple of stock A7s they had on the forecourt at the time, but he could not obtain the keys to either as they had literally sold moments before, and this was a few years back when the recession was on in a big way! He sealed the deal and was not perturbed in the slightest when I told him that his TT was a girls car.


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## Cookies

nbray67 said:


> Nope.
> 
> The Jag salesman simply looked us up and down when we walked upto the F Type in the showroom. Seemed uninterested when my wife sat in the F Type even though she was gleaming with joy over it.


Lol - serves me right for stereotyping. Same thing happened a good mate who is a GP. Has a work car, a 15 year old diesel corolla, and he stopped off at a BMW dealership to have a look at, and drive a new m3. He didn't get a drive in it!

Cooks

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## muzzer

nbray67 said:


> Nope.
> 
> The Jag salesman simply looked us up and down when we walked upto the F Type in the showroom. Seemed uninterested when my wife sat in the F Type even though she was gleaming with joy over it.
> He had the attitude of 'can you afford it' in my opinion.
> 
> Stratstone Jaguar Doncaster.
> No idea of the salesman's name as he never introduced himself or gave us his full attention at any point during our visit to their showroom.
> 
> The young BMW salesman was, without a doubt, one of the best salesmen we've ever encountered. Very well dressed, polite, knowledgeable and down to earth in every way.
> He was helpful and considerate all the way thru the sale process.
> Unlike the Jag salesman, he never gave us the 'can you afford it' body language.
> 
> This was Stratstone BMW Doncaster.
> Bahle Mhlanga was the salesman's name if anybody my way ever goes into the BMW dealer.


Having been to both that doesn't surprise me, i would have gone for the younger guy treating you like a customer as he will probably want to make his mark, older fella probably thinks he knows it all.


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## nbray67

Cookies said:


> Lol - serves me right for stereotyping. Same thing happened a good mate who is a GP. Has a work car, a 15 year old diesel corolla, and he stopped off at a BMW dealership to have a look at, and drive a new m3. He didn't get a drive in it!
> 
> Cooks
> 
> Sent from my D6603 using Tapatalk


Funny world at times I guess as the we could've driven whatever we wanted on the day at BMW.

We didn't enquire about a test drive at Jag but I guess we would've been declined, or am I just stereotyping?


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## GleemSpray

A good salesperson will engage with everybody who walks in, and, using some well structured questions, will quickly get them talking about what they want and what they are able to buy.

Starting conversations with people that open them up and then listening carefully to what they say, is a true skill.

If they are a timewaster, that professional will quickly disengage from them in a friendly way, encouraging them to stay and look around to their hearts content.

If they are a _really good_ salesperson, that customer who walked in will go away thinking they are valued and that the salesperson was a really good listener, even if they are a tyre kicker / timewaster.


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## BigMart

Car salespeople have a really bad reputation for this.
I have been in sales for 20 years so have a lot of experience and training to reference ....and most car sales people make me cringe.
Most are disinterested by their job and are trained to look you up and down and make a 20 second judgement if you can afford it.. and move on to someone else if you cannot.
I've gone to negotiate jags and range rovers and been refused test drives of both when arriving in older cars and dressed casually.
(I also bought brand new jag and range rovers elsewhere - I wasnt just tyre kicking)
Gleemspray..
You are absolutely correct , a few well reasoned questions will get you to the truth almost as quickly and you may be able to steer the customer into a better choice/ better car / whatever if the customer beleives you are asking in their best interest.
Most car salespeople I have ever met I wouldnt buy a newspaper from them.

You only need to watch a columbo film to see how it's done ... He never treated anyone any differently and always had one more question..
YMMV
Mart


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## Jack R

A mate of mine used to work at the local Bentley dealers, and they where always told to serve the man wearing jeans and t-shirt before the man wearing the suit as the one in jeans has probably brought cash with him, evidently this was true with 3 out 5 people on average.


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## HEADPHONES

Way back in in 2005 I rolled up to the local BMW garage in a 93 plate Honda.
Dressed smart/casual in chinos etc.
In this case it wasn't what I wore but what I drove that dictated my lack of service.
Showroom was empty that Friday afternoon.
Sat in a 330ci clubsport.
Felt nice.
A "nice" suited lady approached with a condescending "can I help you?"
I explained the 330ci was high on my list but wanted a test drive to decide.
"we don't have any available to test drive at the moment, but we could arrange a 318i"
When I replied saying that would be of zero help in my decision she used the same smug tone and said "WELL IF YOU HAVE A BUSINESS CARD, WE CAN MAYBE GET BACK TO YOU IF A 330ci DEMONSTRATOR BECOMES AVAILABLE"

She seemed shocked when I produced my card with my surgery's details on.
Then she tried to make friendly small talk about how they look after alot of doctors
Got a call within the hour to arrange a test drive which I politely declined as I had just visited Nissan and fell for a 350z.
It's one thing to not give as much time or service to someone who doesn't appear to have the means to purchase, but to try and make someone feel small and embarrass them in the process is inexcusable


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## OrangeManDan

I've had this so many times. 

How you dress definitely effects how you get treated in my opinion. I agree that some people can tell whether you have class or not etc but you can't tell with everyone. It's completely wrong to judge people on this. Whether it's because of their clothes or that you think you know what sort of person they are.

Personally I don't have many clothes and don't bother with dressing tidy as I don't go out etc and I don't particularly care. I'll wear whatever I feel comfortable and as someone at the start mentioned I also don't have any dress sense so I will ask opinions when required to look tidy.

1. I was in the apple shop on two separate occasions, first time I wore jeans and a cardigan and as I walked in I had one of those apple geeks straight at me asking if I needed help (which is annoying in my opinion). Second time round I was wearing joggers and a hoodie and did I get a single person asking if I wanted help, nope not a chance. We were in there for a good 15 minutes and there were plenty of opportunities for someone to come speak to us but they didn't bother. I didn't bother me as I didn't want to buy one of their overpriced and overrated products but was just a shock to see the difference.

2. I walked in to a cycling store with more than enough money to buy myself a decent bike as I was debating getting back into it but I walked in and had a look around to have the store assistant ask "looking for anything or just dreaming are you" in such a way that he was looking down at me. I wish I had told him that I had x amount of money which he's just lost out on but I didn't bother.

3. Myself and two friends went looking in dealerships for my friends new car. I was dressed in joggers and a goodie as usual as the mechanic, the other friend dressed decent and the buyer dressed reasonably smart and had the funds for a new car. As we walked around the dealerships we went in to Vauxhall to have the 30-50 year old sales people basically paying a lot of attention to us from their seats to make sure we weren't doing anything. Similar thing in Nissan, we didn't even go in the showroom but the sales person about 40-50 years old watched us like a hawk to make sure we didn't do anything. Whereas in the Mazda dealer we entered the showroom to a lovely man in his 50s welcoming us and telling us to feel free to jump in the cars and explore and he even left the showroom to deal with other customers. I feel if we were to do that in the other two dealers we would be asked what we were doing.

So I feel it depends on your attire, age and just the people themselves who judge a book by the cover have these people not watched Pretty Woman ��


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## bigeyd

Jesus..wore robes and sandals
Hitler..always very smart looking

Who would the salesmen/judgemental people look down on ? Never judge a book by its cover.


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## Chris Dyson

All of the above so true and an indisputable fact of life.

Before I retired I used to teach business presentation skills and would tell my students of the 9/90 rule. This is where we make up 90% of our minds about people in the first 9 seconds of meeting them (I believe this has now gone down to 7 sec but that doesn't roll off the tongue as nicely). The first and biggest clue we use is what people look like, their clothes and grooming. Second is what they sound like - not what they say but accent and diction. Lastly, what we say, but by that time it can be too late. If a bad first impression has already been made our brains switch off and we don't really listen. Everything everyone else has said above will usually re-inforce that first impression. Once a poor impression has been made about the only thing that can save it, quickly it is manners, etiquette and behaviour.

You've highlighted two old but very true sayings; 'first impressions count' and 'you only get one chance at a first impression'.


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## Starbuck88

Interesting thread. 

I just read through it all and a couple of stories come to mind. 

Buying a brand new house. 2 developers. Taylor Wimpey and Persimmons. 

We saw a lovely sales lady at Persimmons first, so much so we paid a small initial deposit, this was for an off plan property. In honesty we rushed a bit due to excitement as it would be our first house and it wasn't entirely made clear the property, a house, would be leasehold! We went back the following day there was a different sales lady, again she was lovely but we were informed the sales lady that would be based 100% at that site was away and she'd be back the following week, only she could really get the ball rolling for us.

So after having a week to look up more details, get more sorted with the mortgage people etc I got concerned more and more about the house being leasehold and the build times due to mortgage offers running out. We went back, this time greeted by the main lady who would take us through the entire process.

Oh My.. just her general manner was abrupt, abrasive and really rather peculiar. I was scared basically to just talk to her. I asked her why they've gone down the route of leaseholding when all the other developments in the area were freehold.

Her answer...... "So people like you can afford to buy a house". 

Me and The Mrs went straight from Persimmons to Taylor Wimpey, got treated like long lost friends and ended up buying a brand new freehold house for 20 grand more. 

People like us, wtf was that supposed to mean. Was it the way we were dressed? By no means scruffy, well I might have been and we were in our old workhorse Peugeot 206...is that the reason?


On the flip side. I used to be a new and used car salesman. PSA group (Peugeot and Citroen). If you're polite, friendly and ask the right questions, you can easily spot a tyre kicker from somebody who is ready to buy. My thoughts though were that if I treat the tyre kicker nicely, they may tell others what nice service they had and would send people my way. Which they did. The difference in how much somebody would pay for a car compared with their 'clothes' mean nothing to me as I know people from all walks of life and I can assure you the people I would consider 'rich' I.E Millionaires, look like utter tramps on a day to day basis.

A couple came in, scruffy looking as you like but when chatting to them, they were honestly just lovely down to earth people looking to buy something suitable to tow a trailer tent. They wanted something with good visibility, be a bit higher up than a car and have some room for stuff in the boot. I suggested a C3 Picasso, seemed to tick all the boxes and before any paperwork, taking numbers or anything, I offered a test drive. They said 'what just like that?' I said 'I'll need a copy of your driving licence but we can go out and take one for a good run' (I thought it a bit weird they said that, I was thinking then that maybe they hadn't been to look at a car for a long time or never been to a new car dealership before or something).

They weren't making much 'noise' on the test drive, they seemed to like the car but weren't giving indications of actually wanting to buy it or not. When we pulled up to the forecourt, asked if they'd like to come in for a coffee and a chat about prices etc, again they seemed a bit perturbed but overall happy.

After showing prices and deals we could do, straight away, we'll buy it. All of a sudden, after that, they seemed to relax, told me the story of how they'd literally just come from a Landrover Dealership who wouldn't give them the time of day, wouldn't let them have a test drive, basically gave them a pricelist when asking about costs etc. 

They said they actually wanted a Freelander and it was their first port of call but because of how they and then I treated them, they bought from me.

I'll never, ever know why some sales people behave the way they do. If you don't like your job as a salesperson, stop doing it and do something else. You have to be a genuine people person. I see and now have to deal with telephone sales people, the worst people by far are those who 'think' they're a people person when in reality they're just very pushy and arrogant which turns people off straight away.


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## brooklandsracer

Starbuck88 said:


> Interesting thread.
> 
> I just read through it all and a couple of stories come to mind.
> 
> Buying a brand new house. 2 developers. Taylor Wimpey and Persimmons.
> 
> We saw a lovely sales lady at Persimmons first, so much so we paid a small initial deposit, this was for an off plan property. In honesty we rushed a bit due to excitement as it would be our first house and it wasn't entirely made clear the property, a house, would be leasehold! We went back the following day there was a different sales lady, again she was lovely but we were informed the sales lady that would be based 100% at that site was away and she'd be back the following week, only she could really get the ball rolling for us.
> 
> So after having a week to look up more details, get more sorted with the mortgage people etc I got concerned more and more about the house being leasehold and the build times due to mortgage offers running out. We went back, this time greeted by the main lady who would take us through the entire process.
> 
> Oh My.. just her general manner was abrupt, abrasive and really rather peculiar. I was scared basically to just talk to her. I asked her why they've gone down the route of leaseholding when all the other developments in the area were freehold.
> 
> Her answer...... "So people like you can afford to buy a house".
> 
> Me and The Mrs went straight from Persimmons to Taylor Wimpey, got treated like long lost friends and ended up buying a brand new freehold house for 20 grand more.
> 
> People like us, wtf was that supposed to mean. Was it the way we were dressed? By no means scruffy, well I might have been and we were in our old workhorse Peugeot 206...is that the reason?
> 
> On the flip side. I used to be a new and used car salesman. PSA group (Peugeot and Citroen). If you're polite, friendly and ask the right questions, you can easily spot a tyre kicker from somebody who is ready to buy. My thoughts though were that if I treat the tyre kicker nicely, they may tell others what nice service they had and would send people my way. Which they did. The difference in how much somebody would pay for a car compared with their 'clothes' mean nothing to me as I know people from all walks of life and I can assure you the people I would consider 'rich' I.E Millionaires, look like utter tramps on a day to day basis.
> 
> A couple came in, scruffy looking as you like but when chatting to them, they were honestly just lovely down to earth people looking to buy something suitable to tow a trailer tent. They wanted something with good visibility, be a bit higher up than a car and have some room for stuff in the boot. I suggested a C3 Picasso, seemed to tick all the boxes and before any paperwork, taking numbers or anything, I offered a test drive. They said 'what just like that?' I said 'I'll need a copy of your driving licence but we can go out and take one for a good run' (I thought it a bit weird they said that, I was thinking then that maybe they hadn't been to look at a car for a long time or never been to a new car dealership before or something).
> 
> They weren't making much 'noise' on the test drive, they seemed to like the car but weren't giving indications of actually wanting to buy it or not. When we pulled up to the forecourt, asked if they'd like to come in for a coffee and a chat about prices etc, again they seemed a bit perturbed but overall happy.
> 
> After showing prices and deals we could do, straight away, we'll buy it. All of a sudden, after that, they seemed to relax, told me the story of how they'd literally just come from a Landrover Dealership who wouldn't give them the time of day, wouldn't let them have a test drive, basically gave them a pricelist when asking about costs etc.
> 
> They said they actually wanted a Freelander and it was their first port of call but because of how they and then I treated them, they bought from me.
> 
> I'll never, ever know why some sales people behave the way they do. If you don't like your job as a salesperson, stop doing it and do something else. You have to be a genuine people person. I see and now have to deal with telephone sales people, the worst people by far are those who 'think' they're a people person when in reality they're just very pushy and arrogant which turns people off straight away.


Nice tale there fella, top bloke for using common sense in your selling and how you don't judge people. Shame not all people are like this.
I am often in my work clothes popping into shops or my running kit and you do get treated different more often than not but hey ho thats the world we live in.


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## c87reed

Whenever I've been looking for a car, and indeed my new-build, more often than not I've been either dressed like a tramp or not overly smart. This often means that I get time to look without being questioned or bothered, sales staff just assume I can't afford anything so I never get hassled - which is sometimes a bonus, I like to have a look before even considering anything. But I have also gone on to spend money in this same attire on a number of occasions.


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## ollienoclue

In a slight deviation but linked issue, is it just me or has the general level of skill in _anything_ work related in Britain these days generally fallen off a cliff??

I see/feel it a lot, there seems to be a pervading feeling of 'just can't be assed' in the country today. I often wonder if I am living in a dream world and that the reality for people is rather different than the one I perceive?

Solicitors, Doctors surgeries, Car dealerships, any kind of selling situation be it a phone or whatever, it often feels quite the same.

I don't take offence at being treated in any way in particular and have no doubt that when I began in sales I probably put a few feet wrong here and there, but no lasting harm done, but it does make you wonder quite which direction the country is going. This kind of attitude is surely contagious and children too will eventually mature and adopt the same social and professional posture?

Unfortunately I am not old enough to have a handle on what life was really like in the 80s or before, some of the forum must have a longer reaching perspective?

Lastly, in respect to sales, I totally agree. If you aren't into it, don't enjoy it at all, or don't feel it is for you, you need to get out of it as soon as possible. It just won't work. I would even go so far to say that if a seasoned salesman gets out of bed on the wrong side one morning, he is probably best off staying at home. It is hard work and very mentally tiring at times, or certainly is in my profession anyway. You just get burned out and there is an awful lot of grind to get through sometimes. But then you get the sale however, even the small ones, the sensation I find is the best thing in the world, and I imagine it to be akin to working as a Doctor in a children's hospital, fixing kids all day. Nothing else can come close to it.


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## Starbuck88

ollienoclue said:


> In a slight deviation but linked issue, is it just me or has the general level of skill in _anything_ work related in Britain these days generally fallen off a cliff??
> 
> I see/feel it a lot, there seems to be a pervading feeling of 'just can't be assed' in the country today. I often wonder if I am living in a dream world and that the reality for people is rather different than the one I perceive?


I seem to think this too. I deal with 50 or so different businesses every day with all manner of things and everybody is half arseing it.

It's everywhere, when you go shopping, when you buy something, it's all just 'good enough' nothing seems to be perfect. Nobody seems to be striving to be the best at what they do.

Of course this isn't the case for everybody and I'm sure many if not all on here with our particular interest are probably more particular in the way we all go about things in our home and work lives the way we strive for perfection with our cars? no?

I think if I had the capital to start a bricks and mortar type business it'd be a doddle to beat the reputation of others close by.


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## wish wash

Stopped caring along time ago what people think of me as they serve no reliance on my life. Car sales is the worst, I got told once don't touch what you can't afford.


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## GleemSpray

Starbuck88 said:


> I seem to think this too. I deal with 50 or so different businesses every day with all manner of things and everybody is half arseing it.
> 
> It's everywhere, when you go shopping, when you buy something, it's all just 'good enough' nothing seems to be perfect. Nobody seems to be striving to be the best at what they do.
> 
> Of course this isn't the case for everybody and I'm sure many if not all on here with our particular interest are probably more particular in the way we all go about things in our home and work lives the way we strive for perfection with our cars? no?
> 
> I think if I had the capital to start a bricks and mortar type business it'd be a doddle to beat the reputation of others close by.


I think the world is changing, in that many of the younger generations (... i do realise this is going to turn into a "kids of today" type rant.... ) have no real drive to overcome hurdles.

Its kind of a "want it NOW" mentality, coupled with an inflated sense of entitlement that comes a lot, i think, from TV and social media. When i was younger, my influences were pretty much from the immediate world around me, with a bit of TV influence.

Now, its a case of why bother working when someone from TOWIE / X Factor / You Tube channel has gone from zero to hero in two months getting blingy clothes and a blingy car and drinks champagne at trendy night clubs ?

What we need is a damm good war - bring back National Service etc,etc..:lol:


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## hardyd44

I little true story that happened to me..

I was working near Hyde Park in London in an area that did not look very nice but I would imagine that it was an expensive area.

I was talking to another guy on the job (we are in the street waiting to start) when a guy who really looked like a tramp started to walk towards us, I deliberately did not look him the eye as I thought he was the local nutter and left it to the other guy , the tramp then said in the most cut glass accent I have ever heard "Gent's - is my Aston Martin in your way" pointing at a immaculate Aston near us (we are in HGV's) "because I will move it out of your way" - which he did just to make life easier for us


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## Starbuck88

hardyd44 said:


> I little true story that happened to me..
> 
> I was working near Hyde Park in London in an area that did not look very nice but I would imagine that it was an expensive area.
> 
> I was talking to another guy on the job (we are in the street waiting to start) when a guy who really looked like a tramp started to walk towards us, I deliberately did not look him the eye as I thought he was the local nutter and left it to the other guy , the tramp then said in the most cut glass accent I have ever heard "Gent's - is my Aston Martin in your way" pointing at a immaculate Aston near us (we are in HGV's) "because I will move it out of your way" - which he did just to make life easier for us


:lol: exactly what I said above, the rich people I know, utter tramps unless there is an 'occasion'.

I think the problem is also is that not only the clothes you wear but how attractive you are too. I'm not an attractive guy but I've seen how both men and women seem to go that extra mile for someone they think is 'fit'.


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## enc

Moral of the story ... don't judge a book by its cover ...
Guy walks into a Bentley dealership.. covered in tattoos, decked out in sports gear, southern drawl accent and can't pronounce his "Th's" so he's like .. I fink and I fort... turns out it's David Beckam ... could have any car he wanted in the showroom haha.
Edit: obviously just a scenario:lol:


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## waqasr

Its very true. Ive a good friend who owns a famous and very busy restaurant in London. He went into a Jag dealer looking to buy the xfr, dressed in trainers, scruffy jeans and tshirt and didnt even get acknowledged after 20 or so minutes. Went into the mercedes dealer across the road and brought the SLS, went back to the Jag dealer and advised them not to judge a book by its cover.

Myself, Im just not bothered what people think and I generally wear what I feel comfortable in, so mostly its joggers and t shirts, I find jeans, shirts trousers uncomfortable.


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## Titanium Htail

A friend was a throttle man on a F1 power boat, the guy who owned it let him use his Rolls Royce to travel to events, he did mention how well he was treated when in reality he became somewhat invisible in his normal attire.


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## Bulkhead

I'm going to play a little Devil's Advocate here. Many of you have been berating a variety of people for not making an effort with you or those you know because of their dress. Have you ever thought that it works both ways? If you haven't made an effort in your appearance or manner, why should they? After all, they don't know you like you know yourself so first impressions are all important. I realise it's their job to engage you but let's be honest, if the roles were reversed you'd probably be no different. It's a product of evolution that we favour good looks and dress. I'm not saying it's right but it is a fact of life. However, I think the main issue is that people just don't know how to communicate anymore and it's especially bad in the UK. When I moved to Oz ten years ago, I was astounded at how friendly and willing to engage in conversation people were. I found myself, and still find myself, chatting to complete strangers as if we'd known each other for years. When I come home, nobody gives you the time of day and most people are just down right rude. I actually walked out of three coffee shops in one day on my last visit because of it. Be the best you can be, from dress to personality. If everyone does this, it will be a nicer place.


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## baxlin

Some years ago, I occasionally had to talk to school classes, mainly years 7 and 8, so most of the time the students were wearing school uniform.

But one time, it was a charity 'non uniform' day. What a difference in the pupils! It was as if they were on their own turf, as it were, so much more confident and outgoing. It was quite intimidating for a while.

Any teachers on here experience this?


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## dubstyle

I've had this recently as I've just bought a new car.

I pretty much live in shorts and t-shirt/hoodie and have no dress sense. I went to VW, Seat, Skoda, Toyota and audi not once did anyone even look at me.

Few week ago called in to BMW just looking round and seen a car i liked, the sales guy i dealt with just asked if i needed any help and 20min later new car bought.

I did say to him that i pretty much get ignored when looking at cars due "Comfy dress code" and his reply was he did more deals with people like me than people dressed up who want more for nothing which was surprising.


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## ncd

baxlin said:


> Some years ago, I occasionally had to talk to school classes, mainly years 7 and 8, so most of the time the students were wearing school uniform.
> 
> But one time, it was a charity 'non uniform' day. What a difference in the pupils! It was as if they were on their own turf, as it were, so much more confident and outgoing. It was quite intimidating for a while.
> 
> Any teachers on here experience this?


Similar to what happened at my daughters school and as such they now don't do the dress down/mufti days due to the fact the behaviour of alot of the children changed for the worse when wearing their own clothes.


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## Big Bri

I sat with my son watching the Rugby last night[Wigan stank].I cleaned two pairs of shoes the old fashioned way.My shoes are NEVER real dirty,but they get the full treatment once a week,with a freshen up every day.My feet are not good,so the shoes cost a few quid,Brogues.Clean shirt every day.A nice ironed trouser and waist coat.
My lad asked,how often do you clean your shoes these days.I can see you love cleaning them,your grinning while doing them.
I informed him i was grinning because, i wasn't cleaning my dads work boots and shoes,mums shoes and my brothers along with my own.When my brother got old enough,it became his job.I was promoted to rubbish and make a fire in the morning.After knocking my uncle up for work,who lived about two miles away.
Then when i got married and had kids.Cleaned all the shoes they had also.
Now i only have my own to clean.
He informed me he didnt clean his anymore like i taught him.
I informed him,
You can lead a horse to water,but a pencil must be lead.

One chance to make a first impression,One chance.

BB


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## Talidan

Made me think of this thread today, So this morning i had to nip down to the bank to get some money out before work and I just chucked on a scruffy t shirt and jogging bottoms.

I specificly qued up so I could speak to someone that could help me, when I got to the front of the queue she asked how can I help so I said "hi I need to withdraw some money please" she said cash machines are over there, I explained the cash machine has a daily limit and she then said sorry people don't normally withdraw over there daily limit.

Sounds very simple but it was the manner it was said, and im 99% certain it would of been dealt with differntly if I had of gone in a suit and not in a rush.

So I agree.

Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk


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## Caledoniandream

It is a lot leaning on Unconscious bias, e.g. We already have in our mind, a scruffy person is a thief/ molester / robber, or general not thrust worthy. 

You only have 1 second to make a first impression, but you are working against Unconscious bias, and Conscious bias.
Every person is biased in their nature, it's there to protect yourself, and helps to make the decision to run or fight (not literally) 

It's easy to let it work for you in the opesite way, why would you dress scruffy if you are going to do the for most people the second biggest purchase in your life (after a house)?
Why would you not play them at their game? 
It's a game of cat and mouse, but I am willing to be shaved, dressed and polish my shoes to overpower the other party and drag the best deal out of it.

I do that professional and also if I buy anything worth to think about for myself.
I don't shave and dress to go Saturday morning to the supermarkets,, not interested.

If I buy a car for the business (or lease) and there is nothing to gain, I do it in my boxers behind the computer.

But when I buy something expensive, and want to have fun with it, I dress correct, make sure I have all the facts right, and try to know everything about the purchase I am making.
I does work, I get mostimes the more "senior" sales managers, who actually can do the deal, without having to walk backwards and forwards. 

I don't want to deal with someone who doesn't have a clue, and is there to deal with time wasters etc. 

It's a game, play it at the right level and the rewards are worth it.


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## GleemSpray

Talidan said:


> Made me think of this thread today, So this morning i had to nip down to the bank to get some money out before work and I just chucked on a scruffy t shirt and jogging bottoms.
> 
> I specificly qued up so I could speak to someone that could help me, when I got to the front of the queue she asked how can I help so I said "hi I need to withdraw some money please" she said cash machines are over there, I explained the cash machine has a daily limit and she then said sorry people don't normally withdraw over there daily limit.
> 
> Sounds very simple but it was the manner it was said, and im 99% certain it would of been dealt with differntly if I had of gone in a suit and not in a rush.
> 
> So I agree.
> 
> Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk


I think that it was more likely because you said "some" money, and the cashier was just trying to be helpful so you didn't have to queue unnecessarily in future.

I am certain that If you had said a specific amount above the daily limit, it would have been obvious why you had come to the window.

Sent from my HTC 10 using Tapatalk


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## 20vKarlos

I've just come across this thread so apologies that I've not read it entirely... 

I walked into a well known "sofa sales place" once... I was in my 'weekend comfys', joggers and polo shirt.
I had two grand in my pocket! I had one intention that weekend! Keep the wife happy! :lol:

We walked in with our children and not one person said a word. 
20 minutes later, still nothing.
I'd tried to grab a few people but still nothing.
We had tried a few sofas but kept going back to a particular sofa. 
I had a few questions but nobody was interested. So I said to my wife, it's because of the way I'm dressed. I'll come back next week in my suit and see what happens then.

However, I couldn't help myself... I had to say something..
I walked over to the managers desk where there were 4 employees all stood chatting.

"Sorry to interrupt your conversation, my wife and I have been in the shop for almost half an hour and we've been ignored the entire time. I've watched several employees ask other couples if they're ok or if they need any help, not to mention that one of your employees has been handing out free cookies to potential customers, conveniently missing our family."

"Oh sorry says an employee, it's just that there aren't any finance deals on at the moment and you'll clearly need the finance!"

"Sorry? please repeat yourself... in fact don't. I'm not here for an argument, in fact I was here to purchase a sofa, however, I won't be purchasing from your store and I'll make damn sure to complain to head office in regards to your comments today.It's reassuring to know that you've judged someone by how they're dressed.

(I asked a 'well dressed' gent, who was also shocked to hear the words from the employee)
Sir, you don't have to answer this question, but do you plan on buying something in this shop today? He replied "Actually no, I just came in to pass some time while my wife was next door.

I'm sorry to bring you into this conversation sir and apologies if I've embarrassed you in any way.

I just turned to the manager and said "have a wonderful day and let this be a lesson to you and your employees. Just so you're aware, I have £2,000 in my pocket and I'd come to this store today with one intention."

I then had a wonderful chat with the 'well dressed' gentlemen. He was totally shocked and said I think you handled that pretty well in all honesty, very calmly

Have a great day....


Let's just say I got a discounted sofa


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