# How to tell someone he doesn't know how to wash his car...



## Rich114 (Jan 30, 2012)

Hi guys,

Been browsing the forum for a while, and finally thought I'd join.

Just got more seriously into detailing recently with clay bar'ing/polishing/waxing, but been using a good washing method (2 bucket method w/Hyper Wash, wash mits/drying towels/MFs/good quick detailer etc.) for many years.

Guy across the road has a relatively new car (11 plate) that he regularly washes once a week. However, his method is terrible: pressure washer seemingly on the highest setting, blasting away a couple of inches from the paint; then using one bucket, he has a sponge he keeps dipping in and out of it (without rinsing), and in the same wipe he can be cleaning the very bottom of the bumper, then go to the rear quarter and up onto the roof, all without even putting his "sponge" back into the bucket, let alone giving it a proper rinse!

Finally, he uses a chamois leather to dry the car off at the end.

I find this extremely frustrating to watch, as he won't have spent an insignificant amount on his car, and he clearly has enough pride to want to keep it clean all the time, but he just doesn't know how to go about it properly without risking damage to the bodywork!

We're on good terms with them, though rarely speak as our routines are different. Can anyone recommend a good way to approach it, without coming across as condescending? Just want to help out rather than anything else, but as we all know, people can be "funny" in such situations!


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## The Cueball (Feb 8, 2007)

have you thought he is happy with what he is doing?!?

I would keep out of it, if he wants to know more, I'm sure he sees you out with all your bits n bobs and would come over and ask...

people have pride in keeping a car clean, but may have no interest in going to the lengths we do on here....

a guy I know with a brand new bentley doesn't let me waste my time cleaning it as he uses hand washes... he's happy with it just being clean...

:thumb:


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## sammatty (Jul 28, 2010)

I wouldn't, unless he were to ask me about my routine. If he's happily oblivious to his wash routine, who are you to tell him that he's doing it wrongly.


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## stealthwolf (Sep 24, 2008)

Obvious answer is: don't. He's obviously happy with the way he does his thing or he would have come and had a chat with you about it.

EDIT: Beaten by the Cueball!


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## Rich114 (Jan 30, 2012)

The Cueball said:


> have you thought he is happy with what he is doing?!?
> 
> I would keep out of it, if he wants to know more, I'm sure he sees you out with all your bits n bobs and would come over and ask...
> 
> ...


He'll just be ignorant of/oblivious to the damage/potential damage he's causing, that's all, rather being happy with what he's doing. No-one would be happy if they knew they were potentially doing damage to their pride & joy!! I know that if it was me, I'd certainly appreciate someone taking the time/effort to give me some advice and help me to look after my car better, if I was doing something wrong! But it would need to be done in a suitable way.

It would take no more time/effort/expense to have 2 buckets instead of one, a wash mitt instead of a sponge, a drying towel/MF instead of his chamois, etc. etc. Just some simple changes could really help him, just don't know how to approach it!

Definitely agree that certain car owners just aren't bothered, even with high-end cars; but this guy really seems like he is, his pressure washer will easily have been £150-£200, and he spends a lot of time doing it, just not in the right way!


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## Paddy_R (Jan 10, 2007)

For many that is how to clean your car. Let him live in ignorant bliss, if hes happy and the car cleaner than when he started then who are we to pass comment. Buy a detailing world t-shirt and wear it when your doing your car. You never know he may just ask one day.


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## Sirmally2 (Feb 28, 2011)

Rich114 said:


> It would take no more time/effort/expense to have 2 buckets instead of one, a wash mitt instead of a sponge, a drying towel/MF instead of his chamois, etc. etc.
> !


I disagree with you here im afraid. You can pick up a car sponge for about 19p... But a decent wash mitt is on the heavier side of £6. Add another £1 buket and some decent shampoo thats well over £10. Some people just will not pay this for what they see as something that gets them from a to b. my uncle been one of them. I provide him with everything he needs to do as little damage as possible to his two cars.

It also takes me longer to wash and dry my car using the TBM than when i used to do it with a sponge. Could do a large car in 20mins, but takes me approx 45 mins now and thats a rush job.


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## Rich114 (Jan 30, 2012)

Sirmally2 said:


> I disagree with you here im afraid. You can pick up a car sponge for about 19p... But a decent wash mitt is on the heavier side of £6. Add another £1 buket and some decent shampoo thats well over £10. Some people just will not pay this for what they see as something that gets them from a to b. my uncle been one of them. I provide him with everything he needs to do as little damage as possible to his two cars.
> 
> It also takes me longer to wash and dry my car using the TBM than when i used to do it with a sponge. Could do a large car in 20mins, but takes me approx 45 mins now and thats a rush job.


I understand and appreciate what you're saying, but the guy will have spent close to £20k on his car late last year (it's a Peugeot 308cc convertible, and I doubt he just sees it as a method of transport, though of course many do, but I don't think he's one of them); he cleans it religiously every week, has just moved into the house across the road (sold for £330,000) and is retired, and takes a lot of time cleaning it when he does it (well over an hour); so I doubt he'll be bothered about spending £10 to help him much better look after his car! His pressure-washer is seemingly exclusively used for washing the car, and looks to be a high-end one, so he's already spent a lot on that already, as well as immediately installing an electric garage door when they moved in, so I do think he takes his car pretty seriously.

He seems interested and is putting the time and effort in, just not in the right areas. Personally I couldn't allow myself to watch someone potentially doing damage to their almost-new car (requiring a lot more work to correct in the longer term, let's not forget!) that they clearly think a lot about, and will be hoping to be looking after it/cleaning it to the best of their abilities. I can't speak for anyone else, but if it was me - in any area of my life - I would certainly welcome someone giving me some friendly advice in any area I didn't have much knowledge/experience of, if it meant the task I was doing could be done more effectively!

I'm usually very straight-to-the-point, and know that others can be more sensitive/stubborn and stuck in their ways when it comes to situations like this; so, I don't think just barging over there will be received very well. Perhaps I'll just wait until we're next naturally chatting, and tell him I've just got a new wash mitt etc. to bring up the subject, and see how it naturally progresses from there. If he's not bothered, then at least I've tried to help him.


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## Guest (Jan 30, 2012)

id just leave him to it,he has his way and we have ours


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## jamieblackford (Jan 17, 2012)

I'd tell him, he might be unaware of the damage he's causing to his paint work. Might ask you to do it or show him and might be some money in it for you you never know. Don't tell him directly though like "that's wrong" just point out some swirl marks scratches in the car and explain how they could have been caused by his poor technique. That's what I'd do anyway.


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## Rich114 (Jan 30, 2012)

jamieblackford said:


> I'd tell him, he might be unaware of the damage he's causing to his paint work. Might ask you to do it or show him and might be some money in it for you you never know. Don't tell him directly though like "that's wrong" just point out some swirl marks scratches in the car and explain how they could have been caused by his poor technique. That's what I'd do anyway.


Definitely agree with you; I don't think as a fellow human and car enthusiast, that it's right to just stand by! But it does have to be done appropriately and sensitively.


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## MarkSmith (Dec 17, 2010)

Going slightly against what other peoples opinions are, I would try and chat with him while he he doing his car one day.

I for one would of loved it if someone had taken the time to come and tell me where I was going wrong in my car care routine before I found DW.

I would maybe chat to him while cleaning his car and when he picks up his sponge just say "hey mate, why not try out my wash mitt, they are so much better to use than sponges"

This way it will lead you into chatting about better methods without it sounding like you are saying his methods are crap - you are saying sponges are crap - not his method. This would easily then lead on to other things and he will, if he likes his car as much as you say he does, he will be very interested in hearing what you have to say ( all thanks to him trying out your mitt )

So, in short, before I found DW I would of loved someone to come and tell me about car care techniques, and I would tell him by first mentioning how crap sponges are and "why not try out this wash mitt I use"


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## Rich114 (Jan 30, 2012)

MarkSmith said:


> Going slightly against what other peoples opinions are, I would try and chat with him while he he doing his car one day.
> 
> I for one would of loved it if someone had taken the time to come and tell me where I was going wrong in my car care routine before I found DW.
> 
> ...


Thanks for the reply, I think the idea of lending him my mitt is a great one. I have actually just got a new wash mitt after my previous one finally gave up, so that's a great idea. Also concentrating on the poor products, rather than his poor technique, will surely be a more sensitive way of broaching it 

I'm not trying to get him onto some of the crazy things we all do to our cars on here; just him still doing a relatively simple/easy method, but slightly "better", safer and more effective; which I would hope he'd appreciate me helping him with! I can only go by how I would feel if I was in the same situation, and I would be very happy that someone had taken the time and effort to help me with something, and certainly wouldn't be offended and/or want to carry on doing something in the wrong way. If he takes it the wrong way and is one of these that doesn't take any advice from others (I don't know him enough to know this yet), then I consider that to be his issue, rather than mine for offering my help and time in the first place - assuming I do it in the right way, of course!


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## Mirror Finish Details (Aug 21, 2008)

My neighbour uses a broom to clean his car, but he is a baboon and I enjoy watching him sprape away.
But if if was a decent neighbour yes I would approach him and talk about better car care.


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## Rich114 (Jan 30, 2012)

Mirror Finish Details said:


> My neighbour uses a broom to clean his car, but he is a baboon and I enjoy watching him sprape away.
> But if if was a decent neighbour yes I would approach him and talk about better car care.


lol, yes we used to have one of those on my old street. They used to send their 8-year old son out to do it with a broom actually; he thought he was doing a really good job, felt more sorry for him really.

But definitely wouldn't approach someone like that. The guy across the road however, agree that if it's a decent neighbour we should be doing the "neighbourly" thing and helping out. In contrast, and to turn it the other way round, I know zero about gardening, but still do it from time to time. He's out in his garden all the time, even in the last couple of months - presumably getting it ready for spring - and seems to know what he's doing. If he wants to give me advice on that...I'd be very grateful, and certainly appreciate his advice!


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## vince007 (Sep 12, 2009)

Stick this web page though his door :lol: p.s. dont tell him its from me ok:lol:


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## WhichOne'sPink? (Dec 13, 2011)

Mirror Finish Details said:


> My neighbour uses a broom to clean his car, but he is a baboon and I enjoy watching him sprape away.


Is it bad that reading this made me wince???


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## kempe (Jan 9, 2011)

Alright buddy just a quick one, what wash method did you use before using 2bm, clay and so on?


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## -Kev- (Oct 30, 2007)

leave him to it, obviously works for him. anyway, who's to say that any of us wash cars 'correctly'...?


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## bigmc (Mar 22, 2010)

Is his car clean after he's finished? If it is he's achieved what he set out to do, leave him to it.


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## AaronGTi (Nov 2, 2010)

Print out a load of the guides on here and post them through his door at 3am


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## R7KY D (Feb 16, 2010)

My neighbours method is awful , He watches me spend hours upon hours doing mine , he said to me he could never do it the way I do it . 

In his words "It's just a bit of metal" I suppose he has a point


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## Bel (Mar 1, 2011)

Since you're on good terms with him, I'd tell him.

Or, more accurately, show him by one of two means:

The easiest is to wait for a sunny day and then point out the swirls and marring in his paint and then show him yours under the same light. You could resort to a sungun / LED torch, but for us amateurs I say that if a defect isn't visible in sunlight then we probably don't care about it 

An alternative, if you're really confident that his method ends up with a noticably worse wash is to go 50/50 with him. He does one half (the back, say) and you do the other half.

Of course, you have to be confident that your method - whilst different and acknowledged as "better" around here - really does result in a noticably better finish 

Either he'll be converted, or think you're some kind of obsessive maniac, but at least you get it out of your system!


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## organisys (Jan 3, 2012)

The Cueball said:


> have you thought he is happy with what he is doing?!?
> 
> I would keep out of it, if he wants to know more, I'm sure he sees you out with all your bits n bobs and would come over and ask...
> 
> ...


This. One of my neighbours shows a bit of interest and strikes up a friendly conversation about what I'm up too.

Explaining snow foam was interesting! Most people don't 'get' detailing of course, but where people show an interest, I will answer their question as simply and briefly as I can. They won't remember a whole load of details anyway.


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## nick.s (Dec 21, 2009)

stealthwolf said:


> EDIT: Beaten by the Cueball!


Sounds painful!!!

To the OP, I think this is a classic 'ignorance is bliss' scenario. I have a feeling you'd be wasting your breath judging by your description of his wash technique. That said, if it ever became a topic in passing....


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## Stomper (Jun 8, 2011)

I would watch for him getting his gear out one day , then get yours out and try to do yours as hes doing his . Once hes seen the diference he may be inclined to start asking questions , that way he asked you and not you appearing like a know it all . JMI


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## Alan H (Jun 28, 2009)

I do like to keep my car "tidier" than average, but the vast majority of people aren't interested in paint clarity and "wet look" paint. As long as their car (in their opinion) looks clean they aren't bothered.

I wouldn't say anything unless the person approaches you and asks you about something.

A work colleague of mine shows a keen interest in how I clean my car and he listens with interest to the methods I use. He has even suggested that I show him my cleaning methods "when the weather picks up". But I didn't approach him about it.....


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## Danno1975 (Mar 30, 2009)

Stay out of it mate


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## adamvr619 (Jun 12, 2010)

Bel said:


> Since you're on good terms with him, I'd tell him.
> 
> Or, more accurately, show him by one of two means:
> 
> ...


i defo agree with this method maybe put some music on to grab his attention so he actually looks to see what your doing.

id rather help and IMO i would probablly end up going over ith a few bits of mine to lend him


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## possul (Nov 14, 2008)

Or just leave him to it!
dont take this the wrong way (all of you)
but why do we feel the need to start these threads, and the usual polish cleaning with sponges etc etc
at the end of the day thats how they wash there cars. if its removed the dirt then thats all that matters.
if yours is nice and clean, freshly waxed etc then its all good.
Rant over, ready for the replies if any!!


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## Bel (Mar 1, 2011)

possul said:


> Or just leave him to it!
> dont take this the wrong way (all of you)
> but why do we feel the need to start these threads, and the usual polish cleaning with sponges etc etc
> at the end of the day thats how they wash there cars. if its removed the dirt then thats all that matters.
> ...


I think alot of the "I saw this today" threads are just started for a bit of a laugh and giggle with like-minded individuals and should either be taken in the way they're intended or ignored.

This one, though, is quite specific. He has a neighbour who at least spends the time to hand-wash his car instead of using the £3 hand scrapes.

The actual question wasn't "should I get involved", but "I want to get involved - what's the best way?":



op said:


> We're on good terms with them, though rarely speak as our routines are different. Can anyone recommend a good way to approach it, without coming across as condescending? Just want to help out rather than anything else, but as we all know, people can be "funny" in such situations!


Most, if not all, of us sitting on this forum started out as perfectly normal people, accepting that swirls are just a natural part of paint ageing, and we all had a "eureka!" moment when we discovered this hobby.

So why shouldn't the OP share his knowledge with the neighbour he gets on well with and already takes the time to hand-wash his car?

I say he should.

It's entirely possible that his neighbour will have a bit of a "eureka!" moment and either discover a new hobby or get better results from the time he already invests.

Or he'll just keep doing what he's doing, and that's fine as well, but at least he'll know there's a better way.

Let us know what you end up doing Rich.


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## JohnZ3MC (Mar 9, 2008)

You could always lead by example, sort of like how MarkSmith suggested.

Maybe start by washing your car the same time he's washing his but you use the two bucket method.

Somewhere towards the end of the wash, stroll across the street and give him a 'gift' of a carnauba with fillers. Explain how the fillers fill in microscopic swirls. Show him swirls so he knows what they are.

Eventually you can take that previous info about swirls and explain a few tricks to avoiding them in the future, or at least minimizing them.

It'd be a start and a gentle one at that.

Played right, you might become detailing chums and order stuff together and share shipping.

Give the gentle approach a try.


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## Big Buffer (Jan 1, 2011)

His car at the end of the day and it looks clean to him.

Job done


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## moosh (May 8, 2011)

He most probably watches you do it Rich and says to him self,

What time that guy wastes on his time, check him with his two buckets i think hes a bit mad!

Each to thier own and unless he asks you i dont think its any of your business to tell him he is wrong because in his eyes you will be wrong and insulting to him.

My neighbour can wash two cars in 25 minutes with an open hose and a face cloth, takes me about 2 hours just on the wash. In his eyes i waste time and money on mine and he thinks the face cloth gives the same results, he cant see swirls or marring but i can on the other hand but i would never tell him what he is doing is wrong its not my place.


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## Lambro6 (Jan 29, 2012)

I would definitely have to tell him he's ruining his car. But I wouldn't just waltz round while he's washing the car, and shove all this detailing stuff down his throat.

I'd maybe go around and talk to him one day and ask about gardening. Tell him you always see him doing a great job with his gardening, and ask him for some advice on something, like, "when is the best time to plant daffodils", or whatever is relevant to your garden. 
Then maybe follow it up a week later, and tell him you planted the daffodils, then talk to him about his car, in general.
Then you should tell him, that you sometimes see him washing his car with a sponge, and that they can damage the top layer of paint. This is where you gift him a washing mitt, and it'll be clear whether he'll want you to tell him more about a good cleaning method, or whether he doesn't give a toss, and will probably not accept your gift, but you'll still be on good terms.

IMO. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## svended (Oct 7, 2011)

Best thing is to not approach him as a 'know-all', but as someone who is also interested in keeping his car clean, get a conversation going but don't come across bully-ish and tell him he's doing wrong in your books. It'll take a while, maybe weeks, offer to help him by washing his alloys, and if theres staining, ask him if he minds you using some tar remover or something that'll get rid of it. Let him get curious about your products without ramming your opinion down his throat. People will do things if they think it's there idea and not being told to do it by someone they hardly know.


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## Dan_S (Nov 10, 2011)

Focusing on the title from the OP he's not doing it wrong, he's just not washing it using the same process as detailing enthusiasts expect.

There's no easy way to approach him and say 'you're doing it wrong' just be prepared for him to react positively or apprehensively. If it were me I'd leave it be , but each to their own


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## kirium (Nov 7, 2009)

I think the thing to do is to build up a bit of a rapport with him, based around the only time you really see him, which is when your washing your motors. 

Over the following weeks conversation will turn to and revolve around your cars, you'll then be able to gauge whether or not he's bothered about the swirls he's creating or they're driving him mad. In fact if he's even noticed them might be a good pointer ! Whatever you do, do not wander over and say "you're doing that wrong mate". It will go down like a lead balloon.

I would be pleasantly surprised if he gives a monkey's... I have been (as my wife puts it) "anal" about caring for my cars for the last twenty odd years and in all that time have only met one other person (not through a car club) that had an interest in looking after their car. 

Most people think I'm weird, I regularly get comments from my neighbours "it'll rain again tomorrow" & "the poles will do that for a fiver" & "you'll wear the paint out".... on what planet does waxing a car do that ?? 

I thought my neighbours were odd, but after 17 years I moved last year and thought I might get some "normal" people, however after cleaning the car at the weekend, a full snowfoam job and a quick aqua wax to finish up, the first time in a month and nearly 3k miles the neighbour pipes up "it'll snow tomorrow"... I've lived here 6 months now, he hasn't washed his car yet.

It didn't snow...


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## Big Buffer (Jan 1, 2011)

You would only be wasting your time talking to him about wash techniqe.

Just think your car is minted compared to his 6 month old swirl o matic


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## The Cueball (Feb 8, 2007)

I do laugh at people thinking they have a "duty" or "right" to teach people the "correct" way to wash a car, or make comment on it?!?!?

I think people have been watching a bit too much of "Team America" F**K YEAH!!!!!

:wall::wall::wall:


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## Ross (Apr 25, 2007)

Its not your car so I would leave him happy with what he is doing.People should learn to keep there nose out of other peoples lives.


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## Deano (Jul 7, 2006)

I think we all need to accept that it is _us_ that wash our cars in an abnormal way, not other people. :lol:


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## Goldbug (Sep 23, 2011)

The Cueball said:


> have you thought he is happy with what he is doing?!?
> 
> I would keep out of it, if he wants to know more, I'm sure he sees you out with all your bits n bobs and would come over and ask...
> 
> ...


+1:thumb:


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## Big Buffer (Jan 1, 2011)

Its clean tho so not much more to be said.
Yeah there gonna be imperfections but lets face it before dw i never even noticed such things as rds holograms and swirls.

Yes we are the ones who have ocd but its not something you can pass on to all folk.
Most people barely have the time to care so why should we.


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## Rich114 (Jan 30, 2012)

Bel said:


> I think alot of the "I saw this today" threads are just started for a bit of a laugh and giggle with like-minded individuals and should either be taken in the way they're intended or ignored.
> 
> This one, though, is quite specific. He has a neighbour who at least spends the time to hand-wash his car instead of using the £3 hand scrapes.
> 
> ...


Thanks for the reply - I did ask how to approach it, not if I should, as I already know that I want to.

I got into detailing from having my car regularly professionally valeted outside my office a few years ago, as I just didn't have the time to spend doing it myself at that point; and giving a good image to clients was also important. After some chats with the guy, it became obvious that just simple changes to a washing method can make all the difference; and indeed save you time/money/heartache in the future. Before then, I had just accepted that swirl marks and the like were an inevitability; so this was definitely of help and interest to me, and I wished I'd found this out sooner! I wash my car with a decent method, and look after it, because I want the car I've spent a lot of money on to look good, for me personally, and for business purposes; not because I *want* to spend a lot of money and time on it - detailing isn't a hobby for me like it is for many of you, it's simply the end-result I'm concerned with. I'm sure I'm not alone in just wanting to spend a bit more time on my car to preserve and significantly enhance its condition and appearance; and the guy across the road - with everything taken into account - certainly looks like he tries to already.

Some of you certainly have challenging views of how I should "stay out of it", it's "none of my business", "who are you to say anything", and "just let him keep on damaging his car". I'm surprised that this seems to be how most people on here feel; it seems that we're all more interested in spending insane amounts of time, effort and money on our own material vehicle(s) - and not at all interested in spending just 5-10 minutes passing some of that helpful knowledge and experience onto a friendly neighbour, in order to help him.

We're all different, but certainly from the streets I've lived on, my neighbours and I have always got on very well; passing on friendly, informal advice in areas we mutually don't have as much experience in. I feel this is how a community should be, and it helps us all - even the selfish/disinterested ones, as you too may pick up some knowledge that helps you in certain area, at some stage; however this is much less likely if you don't pass any on yourself 

This has certainly shown a very clear divide anyway:

1. Those that think I should genuinely help: not in a know-it-all, arrogant way; but because we know how much more efficient and effective the "correct" method is - and I define "correct" as the method that is least likely to inflict damage. We all know the 2BM is "the" or "a" "correct" method, as it's very accepted that the 2BM with soft, plush wash mitts; drying towels and MFs is far superior to using a dirty sponge in a dirty bucket; no rinsing; wiping the bottom of the rear bumper in the same motion as the higher panels and roof; and drying off with a leather: let's not kid ourselves!

2. Those that just don't care about helping others, and/or have some sort of issue with "staying out of other people's business" / "who are you to say this" etc.; which is much more of an issue with the way a person chooses to negatively and unreasonably react to such situations, rather than the fault of the other party for just wanting to help.

By far the easiest thing for me to do would be to sit here, watching him potentially damaging his new paint finish week after week; so I'm not sure the reason for the negativity from some posters saying I should just "mind my own business", and what "right" do I have to just want to help a fellow human being. Please...

Some of you are also saying "who are you to tell him" - and the same poster then goes on to say "stay out of it, it's none of your business". Indeed, who are *you* to tell *me* whether or should I shouldn't want to help someone? That wasn't my initial question.

As I've said, I can only judge the situation from how I would feel about it. And if he came over to me while I was amateurishly gardening, I would be exceptionally grateful for him taking the time and effort to pass on some of his knowledge and experience on the subject.



The Cueball said:


> I do laugh at people thinking they have a "duty" or "right" to teach people the "correct" way to wash a car, or make comment on it?!?!?


The Cueball: I'm pleased to have provided entertainment to you :thumb: However, I find it equally baffling that approximately 3/4 of the people (if not more) on this thread think it's okay to sit back and watch someone damaging their property, when they very clearly think they're doing it well, think a lot of that property, and regularly show clear interest in wanting to spend time and money looking after it (or so they think). I certainly couldn't knowingly sit back and watch the poor guy do that, as I'm not as selfish as that.

Let's remember that this is very different to a guy with an old banger washing his car with a broom, as I would be the one laughing at them in that situation, and wouldn't have the slightest bit of interest in getting involved.

Equally, I'm not wanting to force the OCD/anal methods some of us on here use, as I recognise that the vast majority of car owners - enthusiasts or otherwise - just don't want or have the time to put into their cars like that.

However, this is a decent guy, who has spent a significant amount of money on his car, clearly thinks a lot of it, regularly cleans it by hand (contrary to most of the population seemingly now going to a cheap hand/auto car wash) over a significant period of time, has an expensive pressure washer and other items reserved solely for car use; but is just a bit lacking in his techniques, and I know he would benefit ten-fold by using a better (i.e. accepted, much-used the world over) technique/system.

The point also isn't that he needs a wet/glossy/perfect/show finish; it's simply that he would benefit by minimising the significant damage he's probably doing to his car every time he washes it. These are two very different things.



Dan_S said:


> Focusing on the title from the OP he's not doing it wrong, he's just not washing it using the same process as detailing enthusiasts expect.


I'd definitely say that using a dirty sponge in and out of a dirty bucket of water, never rinsing or lubricating anything, wiping the stubborn dirt from under the rear bumper and onto the upper paintwork in the same motion, and almost certainly dragging grit and dirt all over the paintwork with a sponge - potentially causing a lot of damage - is "wrong" - as how can inflicting damage on a nearly-new car possibly be right??

I apologise for the relatively negative and aggressive nature of my post; but this is only in defence to some of the posts I've received. Thank you to the few that actually read my initial post and provided suggestions as to *how* to approach the situation (not if I should): there were some great suggestions re. building rapport/bringing gardening into it/specific products etc., so I will give those a go.

If I can be of help to a fellow car enthusiast, then I'll be more than happy to be. If he takes offence at me offering my free advice and time, offended by my so-called "duty" to help a fellow human if I can, then I'm afraid that's his issue and not mine!


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## Jakub555 (Aug 17, 2011)

We all in some way right
Its like with others things in our life and with the food just for example
Should we approach people ( friends , neighbours ) , buying tesco value products instead of organic one !?
Of course organic are expensive etc. but tesco value still ok , or maybe just ok.
Or if someone is smoker should we do it the same !?
Smoking kills , smoking no good for you etc etc

I would like to let all people know about the right technique etc...
Should we do it!?
Should we ask !?
Should approach them !?

Well , everybody got different opinion
and we know it TAKES TIME to fet to the people

When I tried my own detailing business people thought I'm mad , something wrong with me

I took some time to get to them but again
some of them they don't mind 
clean car is clean car
and even if they rich people etc
what they want is only get the car clean

But we know our technique and rest of things are 100times better
but again better for who !? For us or for them


Just my few words

Kind Regards
Jacob

Have a good day guys

:thumb:


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## Jakub555 (Aug 17, 2011)

WooooW
*Rich114*

what a loooong answer

top man


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## stealthwolf (Sep 24, 2008)

In all honesty, it depends on the relationship between you and your neighbours. If it's that kind of neighbourhood and environment where everyone knows each other and everyone is friendly, then I'd probably go over and have a chat.

But it's more awkward/difficult if you don't know them. 99.99% of people out there just don't care and going up and chatting about what he's doing could potentially cause problems - you might fall out, he might damage your car etc etc. But there's a tiny chance, probably 0.01% or less that he'll be interested and become a DW fanatic.

If I were in your situation, I'd just leave things alone. People round where I live don't wash their car, if they do it's via poles and they don't care about swirls etc. 

I guess the only way you're gonna find out is to go and talk to him. As others have said, just be careful in your approach, build a rapport and offer advice. You want it all to be friendly/lighthearted and be prepared if he says "F*** off".


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## banarno (Aug 3, 2008)

Best thing to do would be the next time you are both out cleaning at the same time, try and strike up a conversation with him, even if it means you jokingly saying to him "you will wash it away!" and see if that breaks the ice, maybe hes a shy guy who is afraid to say anything to you.

Or, he might not want to talk, and just smile at you, in which case, just leave him to it, but at least you will know, and put your mind at ease.


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## Jakub555 (Aug 17, 2011)

It is shame that people don't know about good techniques and how to look after yuor car properly

If you see cowboys especially on the building sides well then you are more than pissed off ( sorry for the word , I do not swear ) and of course you doing something
Even in Tv you got programs about them
SO TBH if somone ( I mean Valeter etc ) damage your car
is there any law or right to get the money back ?
Well as we know 99% they don't know ( general public etc )about properly way to look after , how to look after your car , they think all valeters ,automatic washes are the best ( valeters etc ,well all in my area are very bad ) is there any law to sort the bad valeters , hand car washes ?
If somone can sort the problem with the cowboys builders so why not with the bad valeters etc ?

KInd Regards
Jacob


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## The Cueball (Feb 8, 2007)

Rich, you are quality and a very funny guy...your responses have actually made me :lol: today, thanks......

But, just to maybe clear something up for you, with your "correct" method you stated in your epic post above...

I use 1 bucket and a sponge to clean my cars in the driveway...

You want to come and talk to me about my methods as well?!?!   

Tying in detailing and being a good human was inspirational...and I now know that because I let my neighbours treat their own property the way they want, I am not a good human being 

I pledge from now on I will also now try to help the best I can... Tonight I will go around all my neighbours and ask if they want help making their property look as good as my much older cars....

I am going to talk to fatties when I see them eating McDonalds, they must be told about my better way of eating!!

I am going into pubs to tell the drunks that water is better for them, they obviously don't know!!!

the next time I see a fight, I'll break it up to teach them how to fight "properly".... and on and on and on....where does it end though!!!!! arrrgh, I can see someone using a biro pen...there are better ones out there... I must tell them!!!!

  

<removes tongue from cheek>

I'm not having a serious go at you above, btw 

At the end of the day, if you live in the type of place where people help each other in the way you are thinking about, good for you, top guy... :thumb:

Maybe when it comes to detailing, and the fickle thing that is a car, some of us have learned to stay out, and to let people get on with it....there are far more important things in life to help out with... 

:thumb:


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## Dan_S (Nov 10, 2011)

Rich114 I realise you'd already made up your mind to speak to him when I read your original post. Some provided good recommendations on approaching him as requested. However the majority believe you shouldn't stick your beak in someone's business that by your own admission you've barely ever spoken to. 

By all means go and approach him, it could go any number of ways. I'm of the opinion that if someone wants to find out a better method to do anything they'll look for answers themselves not wait for someone to come and enlighten them.


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## PugIain (Jun 28, 2006)

Id keep out of it. As at the end,hes got a clean car and hes happy.
So what about swirl marks?
My car has them and it still runs.Which afterall is the main point of a car isnt it.To stop you wearing your legs away.
Heres something for the sensitive,I clean my old mans MPV with a brush.
AARRh no!!!


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## chillly (Jun 25, 2009)

Rich114 said:


> Hi guys,
> 
> Been browsing the forum for a while, and finally thought I'd join.
> 
> ...


Only if they ask then i sell all my unwanted gear to them:lol: Dont get involved as most dont care apart from the 30,000 on here


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## Ming (Oct 16, 2007)

Ming's Twopenny Worth
If you saw him knocking a masonry nail in with a wooden mallet would you go across and offer him your hammer?
If you saw him cutting his lawn with shears would you go across and offer him your lawn mower?
Of course you would.
Next time you are out and he is washing his car go over and say hello.
Talk about his car andother stuff and tell him how OCD you are and how your good lady tiakes thep**s.
Then explain WHY you do what you do and how YOU do it. He can eithertake heed of good advice, ignore it completely or do something in between. If someone had approached me when I was cleaning one of my cars in the past and explained and showed me the difference between my car and their car I would have come to detailing much quicker.
Not everyone cares about their car but fromn what you describe this guy does.
A cup of coffee and a chat on a Saturday afternoon goes a long way and might make a friend. worse case scenario he is not interested and thanks you for your time.
If he is rude then no loss anyway.
I would go over in a heartbeat. (I have never been one for not getting involved in stuff though. guess it was my job for too long.)
Ming the Nosey


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## DetailMyCar (Apr 19, 2010)

Try watching a neighbour go out late in the evening with a Karcher BRUSH going all over his brand new VW EOS, it's gut wrenching but having seen me enough times I'm sure he would come and ask / watch to get some ideas of what he could do to improve it....

Scary to think that a bucket and sponge would probably be a far safer bet then what he currently uses - I have to go inside if I hear the noise of the brush bristles against the hard baked on dirt - It literally sends a shiver down my spine.


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## anthonyh90 (Mar 30, 2011)

personally i wouldn't go over and mention it to him, and instead i would just let him come over and speak to me about it first rather than going and preaching like a jehovah's witness.


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## Corsa Ian (Feb 3, 2012)

I had to sign up to post in this thread. I don't get the whole "maybe he's happy with the way he's doing it. If he wants to know he'll ask." Maybe he doesn't know that he's damaging his car. If he's bought a pressure washer and hand cleans it, I'm guess that he wants to take care of it, especially if it was a retirement present to himself. Maybe he thinks the OP is doing it a fancier way. Maybe he thinks it's doing the same job, but different. Maybe he doesn't know about MF's and 2B's. I've not had my car long, it's a 98 Corsa, scratched from when I bought, but as a first car, I wasn't expecting much. I've only washed it once with the "traditional" way, not knowing any better or wiser. Now I know about these methods I'll be sure to do them, and I told my Dad about them too as he did the 1B, sponge and leather cloth. 

If buying a £5 mit (in Tesco they have a 9 piece MF kit for £5 the OP could recommend) saved me a potential couple of Hundred pound on a respray, or a few tens of pounds on a correction kit because I dragged a big bit of dirt over my car with the sponge I'd go out an buy one. I don't think the OP means to say "You need this, this, this, this, this, this, this and a couple of hours to clean your car." All he needs to suggest is 2 buckets, an MF mit and maybe a drying cloth. He doesn't need all these fancy £30 shampoos, but as long as the neighbour is aware that simply buying a £5 MF kit at tesco and another bucket will protect his car...

The OP isn't trying to tell his neighbour how to do a full detail, telling him to wax, polish, clean it so many times, the polish etc, but rather tell him that using his pressure washer too high could peel his paintwork and using a sponge can scratch it is what he wants to do. It might take a couple of minutes extra to keep on putting the mit in 2 buckets and more frequently than he already does. 

I know that I would appreciate it if some knew I was damaging my car and told me rather than knew and let me get on with it. 

I'd just go over and say something like "You should try one of these MF mits. They're really good. They pick up the dirt rather than spread it around and they save your paint work from those circular scratches you get" and then take it from there. If he's interested let him know more, if not you tried, now it's up to him to maybe fork out loads of money from scratching his car because of not listening and spending a few extra quid. 

That's what's wrong with England these day. People don't want to help people. They like to do their own thing and ignore everyone else. If you see someone cleaning his car with a brush, why not tell him? If he's nasty to you, just let him damage his car and laugh when he does. Why keep it to yourself? I bet you'd like it if you were doing some DIY on your house and a neighbour who is a joiner/builder etc told you you were doing more damage than good. Or would you like it if he watched you, laughing that he knows you're doing it wrong and not help you, only for you to need to spend hundreds of pounds to pay someone to fix it?


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## AndyC (Oct 25, 2005)

It's a really nice thought and I've watched my neighbours "cleaning" their cars for years the "wrong" way but I figure they're happy and I'd argue that not doing what we do religiously makes sod all difference come sale time and doesn't really damage paintwork. Makes it swirly maybe but proper damage? No way.


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## Ming (Oct 16, 2007)

AndyC said:


> It's a really nice thought and I've watched my neighbours "cleaning" their cars for years the "wrong" way but I figure they're happy and I'd argue that not doing what we do religiously makes sod all difference come sale time and doesn't really damage paintwork. Makes it swirly maybe but proper damage? No way.


Andy
I can see your point but do not necessarily agree with you. A well maintained car - we are talking the exterior and interior as opposed to the engine - will always sell and will always get a top book price wheras one that is only perfunctorily cleaned will still sell but not for as high a price.
I accept that if worked on properly most of us can take a tatty looking car and turn it around to look like it has been properly looked after. 
As it is impossible to tell which cars have been looked after like we do for their life its hard to tell which ones last longer.
I would also suggest that a properly looked after car - paintwork wise - will have better paint and will therefore look better than a 'normal' car.
Just my thoughts and I will agree that there is an arguement to the contrary.
Ming the Considered


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## BPH (Sep 3, 2009)

Rich114 said:


> Can anyone recommend a good way to approach it, without coming across as condescending?


I'd mind my own business if I were you.

If some clown tried telling me how to wash my car I'd be telling them to do one, sharpish.


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## dcj (Apr 17, 2009)

I,ve taken courage from this thread and told my wife shes not cleaning the house in the correct manner.

Anyone know a good divorce lawyer?


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## alfajim (May 4, 2011)

you can't live other peoples lives for them. let him go on his way and keep an eye on him via your mirror like paintwork


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## Naddy37 (Oct 27, 2005)

Bung him a copy of that Haynes "detailing manual"....


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## moosh (May 8, 2011)

I've thought about this thread a few times and I would reckon the second word in the guys reply would be off? Lol I know the face cloth king next door would certainly reply to me with some savoury lingo :lol:


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## NissanMan (Aug 24, 2010)

To be blunt its shouldnt be a concern to you, would be stopping at every drive thru car wash otherwise:lol: He must see how you wash yours and he he was not happy with his method he would probably ask for tips, i have never been slow in coming forward if i see someone getting better results in better time than me, but im a tradesperson so maybe its a bit different.


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## Trip tdi (Sep 3, 2008)

If he asks you, you can always offer your help, its good to help people that are grateful and it offers a smile to the person and gives you a good feeling you are helping a person out in life, i;m saying demoing on his car not giving him advice; but if the guy does not ask, i would not bother making enemies and telling people how to wash their cars, end of the day they have paid the cash for their vehicle, its their property so i would not go over to a bloke and tell them how to wash a car.

End of the day he is not going to come to you and show you how to hoover a carpet.

Sorry to blunt with yourself and being straight down the line with you, *lifes to short for this *


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## cleancar (Sep 21, 2006)

print off some guides off here and shove em through his letter box


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## tg1 (May 18, 2011)

If you're friendly see if he wants to try some of your stuff, if he does, suggest he borrow's a extra bucket and your mit.

Then he'll have to ask why


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## Weazel (May 29, 2010)

I had a neighbour who was curious about the way in which i was 'cleaning' my car, he came over had a chat, i told him why my method was different from his (to some detail), guess what???, he still washes it his way!!?


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## PG Monkey (Apr 19, 2010)

Weazel said:


> I had a neighbour who was curious about the way in which i was 'cleaning' my car, he came over had a chat, i told him why my method was different from his (to some detail), guess what???, he still washes it his way!!?


I only use the 2BM + microfibre washmitt despite being aware of the full detailing process. It boils down to a severe lack of time and not being high on my current list of priorities.

Before I discovered this place, I would see swirls and think they were a natural part of any car's paint surface. I'm not joking.


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## Ming (Oct 16, 2007)

Some of the replies on this post surprise me somewhat.
There is a guy who is obviously concerned enough about his car to wash it every weekend, more than some on this site I would hazard, but who is not getting the best results he could for his labours. 
There is someone on the other side of the road who could possibly help him get the most out of his time. 
What the hell is wrong in offering advice for crying out loud.
I once posted up a thread on here about a car I cleaned and was lambasted for using a chamois leather. there were lots of folk willing to tell me that I would cause more than I would cure and that I should use any one of about 10 different cloths. Are you guys not my online neighbours? I did not ask for opinions about my wash process but put it out there to explain what I did and how I did it. I got criticsm and fully accepted it. I tried other drying methods and on many occasions I still prefer a properly used clean chamois leather BUT that is up to me and I DID appreciate the help others offered.
At least give the guy a chance to say 'no thanks' to the offer of information. 
At the very least if approached properly you will end up being more neighbourly and if he does rear up and tell you to f**k off then he is not going to be much of a neighbour anyhow.
If I was pressure wahing my drive and a guy came passed and said. 'If you put XXXX on the drive first mate you get a much better result. I do this sort of stuff all the time.' I would thank him profusely and give it a f**king go!!
What is so wrong with trying to help????
Ming the Puzzled


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## NissanMan (Aug 24, 2010)

Ming said:


> Some of the replies on this post surprise me somewhat.
> There is a guy who is obviously concerned enough about his car to wash it every weekend, more than some on this site I would hazard, but who is not getting the best results he could for his labours.
> There is someone on the other side of the road who could possibly help him get the most out of his time.
> What the hell is wrong in offering advice for crying out loud.
> ...


You have very valid points there, pretty much all of which i agree with. My last post was about always wanting to learn better and quicker methods from other people in the same trade as me, but that's because i work on price work, so its in my interest.

Cleaning a drive im sure loads would offer advice, even cleaning windows people would ask advice, and offer it too, i think in the case of a car its a persons pride and joy in a lot of cases, and they give it the love and attention that is to the best of their abilities.

Only a few use forums for their make of car, which generally point to this forum if you see a detailing fanatic posting pics there, we are the minority that follow brand specific forums, and follow what goes on here:thumb: He is obviously happy with what he achieves, if he is not to shallow to ask you what you do, then leave it to him to make the move. Chances are he sees what you do, looks at your car, looks at his and sees the same result, you could shine a torch on his to prove different, and he will think you are a nutter lol......food for thought:thumb:


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## dazfr (Dec 23, 2011)

before i discovered this forum i was like the guy the OP is describing wish some one had told me sooner! my poor car:wall::wall:


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## bmwman (Jun 11, 2008)

I'm all for friendly chatter with neighbours. Although since I put in planning permission my neighbours have turned in to plotting  who give me the stare. One day I too hope to live down a nice quite road, relax and detail my car. By all means if I have a neighbour opposite who may benefit from a little hint or tip then so be it, as said earlier a little brew and a chat cant go a miss. Its nice to be friendly, if washing your car means it allows you the opportunity then thats fantastic. :buffer:


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## suspal (Dec 29, 2011)

having thought about your post i would suggest like some fellow dw ppl have mentioned
do your car at the same time maybe over a brew share pointers, boy's talk break the ice ect 
good luck 
ps being tactile goes a long way lol


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## AndyC (Oct 25, 2005)

How about showing him some of your basic products and tools and asking if he wants to try them out? New shampoo or a mitt or (my personal fave) a plush drying towel - that'll be what is most likely to convince someone to come to the dark side.

I still think it's a nice idea - all I'd say is, if you use the mowing the lawn analogy for a second, if my neighbour offered to help me mow the lawn then great (if a little weird), however if he then proceeded to tell me how I'd been doing it wrong, not so great - it's all about how you come across.

Most of my neighbours are either 30 minute merchants or use the local hand wash/swirlomatic/valeting place at Homebase and TBH at 10' or more you'd be hard pressed to tell the difference other than on a sunny day.

I still maintain that a "non detailed" car won't be damaged - using that argument then 99% of cars on the roads have to be damaged and the truth is most regard a "clean" car as being less dirty than when they started washing it. Bottom line is that if, as most do, you trade in it won't make the slightest difference - we traded Mrs C's Clio in last January and it had been neglected for some months AND taken through the swirlomatic. We got £250 over top book for it.

My Dad's first Meriva hadn't been cleaned to OCD standard and when I tidied it up just to satisfy my own weirdness the arch liners in particular blew me away...bear with me on this. They'd not seen a hosepipe or PW in 25k and after a quick spray with APC and hose off via PW they looked like new - brand spanking new. Never dressed or in fact cleaned properly. Ditto with the window ledge trims. OK, the Vauxhall dealer did admit that in that condition it could straight to forecourt but then promptly "reduced" the list of the new car by something daft like 45% so it all became academic.

Basically I guess I'm happy to buy a car needing cosmetic TLC but not mechanical - FSH is more important to me than "washed regularly".


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## gally (May 25, 2008)

See people jumped on the defensive very quickly in here. I kinda agree with the leave him to it but nothing wrong with being nice, my neighbour actuallly approached me funnily enough, I detailed it for him and then he bought a few bits and bobs. Gave him a bottle of FK SP SD and some MF's, happy as larry and it's been immaculate ever since.

It's easy to do if you speak to him quite a bit, not so much if you don't.

Why don't you offer to give it a quick wash and clean for him, nothing fancy. Show him how shiny it can actually get?


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## Mike k (Oct 14, 2011)

I'd start off by if u make eye contact just nod at him and say hi then maybe it can lead onto you walking over there and jokingly say 'so your obsessed like me then hey'. Then you can chat about oh yeah i am well into it, i even use these towels now instead of chamois and tell him about your findings etc.

Im making this sound like if your talking to a shy mate who wants to chat up a girl that he likes haha.


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## Lambro6 (Jan 29, 2012)

The million dollar question: Have you told him yet?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## j1ggy (Feb 17, 2012)

Well, the worst I got from my neighbor(s) was - You washing your car, again?! And watch out not to wash away the color. But, then again I was lucky and smart enough to open a shop in another town. So I don't annoy my neighbors. Truth be told, some of them wash their cars using household broom. And then I'm the weird one...


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## Big Buffer (Jan 1, 2011)

I say this again not everyone is a detailer pro or amateur.
Your car is the 1 that matters and if people dont understand best not to argue.
It not easy trying to tell people 2bm wash paint correction waxing and seal.
If everyone did this, DW would not be unique and we woiuld all just be car cleaners.


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## j1ggy (Feb 17, 2012)

I couldn't agree more, but ain't it nice when people (not close to you) just go about their own business?


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## Tips (Mar 27, 2011)

Great response there - I only tell peeps of my detailing techniques if they want to know more or show an interest in what I'm doing.

With anyone else I just nod in appreciation and go on about my own business.
I would never tell anyone they are doing it all wrong, unless they ask me for advice.

We were all newbies once.


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## MK1Campaign (Mar 27, 2007)

I wouldnt bother. Hell just think your a wierdo lol


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## greenwagon (Dec 31, 2008)

If your on nodding times 
Wander over with your towel next time you are out and say "try that to dry it "which will take him 5/10 minutes that will sell the detailing package theme


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## MR.Q (Apr 19, 2010)

greenwagon said:


> If your on nodding times
> Wander over with your towel next time you are out and say "try that to dry it "which will take him 5/10 minutes that will sell the detailing package theme


I was going to suggest something along the same lines - I was going to say, How about you walk up to him next time he is out doing his car and make up some BS about you buying this new wax recently and seeing as he also seems to take pride in his car you were wondering if he wanted to try some?

If he is a douche bag about it then you know you've tried and if he is interested then he will ask a question or two, you answer and them BAM....intro him to DW. He'll never look back :thumb:

Good luck bud and good on ya for extending the hand of friendship - what goes around comes around.


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